I am very cautious about trusting women because some are just as capable of being deceitful, underhanded, callous, two-timing, untrustworthy, indifferent and backstabbing as men"”if not worse. I am mindful that women, especially black women, have been treated unfairly, perhaps even more so than vis versa, nevertheless, it is no excuse for them to behave the way they do, especially towards innocent men. Two wrongs don't make a right"”a woman has no more right to mistreat a man than a man has a right to mistreat a woman, regardless of the reason or excuse.
In my personal experience, some of the women I've dated tried to enforce double-standards. In other words, ˜it's okay for me to treat you the way I do/play the silly games I play because.....' Even though I sympathize with black women in their trials and tribulations in dealing with black men, I refuse to be subjected to the collateral punishment a sister will inflict on a brother due to the sins of brothers from their past.
I have a distinct problem with a woman that uses her past experiences as an excuse to behave in a dysfunctional way towards me, for whatever reason. If I can take the time to teach myself how to be more resilient and optimistic with future prospective mates, so should the woman"”this is why I have taught myself how to use a romantic barometer when in the initial stages of getting to know a woman.
When a woman acts aloof or maintains a certain emotional distance, I will make the necessary effort to communicate that inconsistency to her. If after clear communication is achieved, then the next step is to observe her behavior. If the same negative behavior persists, then it's time for me to pull back emotionally.
No, I don't feel it is necessary for a woman to have the freedom to gamble with my emotions while she is free to proceed with her life, take risks and push the limits of my emotional boundaries, yet, if I am inconsistent in my behavior then I am punished and, thereby, for future purposes, she will behave begrudgingly towards me.
I refuse to invest myself emotionally any further with a woman that will make excuses on a continuous basis for her inconsistencies, yet remain emotionally dissonant.
Some women have a tendency to want a man to come out of pocket for them but they will not come out of pocket for you"”they will maintain whatever course they have chosen to maintain in the course of interacting with you, regardless of the sacrifices you make to get closer to them"”in other words, she may not allow professional or educational endeavors to be thrown off track but it's okay for the man, whom may think his efforts are making progress with her romantically, to lose his mind chasing after her, if he's naÃ¯ve and gullible enough to do so.
I said all that to say this"”sisters, we brothers who endeavor to reach our goals are just as at risk as you are"”we have just as much to lose, emotionally, educationally, and career wise by trusting our hearts with you. Fairness should be exercised on behalf of both black men and black women or a lot more brothers and sisters will be living the single life and for much longer than anticipated.