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quote:
Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
You want to know why I don't acknowledge your ramblings, rants, and wishy washy, yes ma'am rhetoric, honestboy? Because the first comment I read of yours was when you whinned like a little girl about not knowing how to socialize in Kentucky and Ebonyrose clowned you - told you to get out of Kentucky.




So let's get something straight. Smile

You invite your co-workers to happy hour because you're such a good guy and want to boost morale (unity and team cohesiveness). This is indeed admirable ....

But then you come in here and take (very) cheap shots at people and do anything but boost morale?

What's your problem?

I mean, come on, my dear Brother Romulus. Dearest Brother. Smile

Time and again, you refer to that same old post of mine (which reflects very little of my life). Namely ... just like the women you criticize, you hang on to one little itty bit thing ... that you think you can use against me later to your advantage.

I.e., You've shown yourself to be both petty and vindictive. You're also overly emotional.

For someone who is supposedly having such a great time with your life you seem to have some real deep emotional scars. So much so that you seem to enjoy inflicting pain. Or at least pathetically trying to inflict pain.

I'm on to you. And I'm not going to react the way you want me to. Because I'm not who you think I am. I don't recognize myself in what you posted. So why should I react to your ignorance and petty spitefulness?


What's your problem?

You want a hug? hug


PS: Note that in my post I referred to "history within living memory".
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quote:
Originally posted by OhBlackButterfly:

How are you going to fix your mouth to berate a black woman for feeling "not quite up to par" in the eyes of the black man when YOU go out of your way to make it plain? On one hand you praise the black womans beauty, and how you'd love to marry her, and then what you SHOW to black women is how you would NOT ONLY let HER know to her FACE that you want to hook up with a nonblack woman, but you go so far as to have the audacity to attempt to PLACE said BLACK woman, in the TACKIEST MOST DISTASTEFUL position possible, of her having to look this NONblack woman in the face, as a favor for YOU, and tell the NONblack woman that you're insterested in HER?!!.

Yep. That's about right. If a black woman puts me in the "TACKIEST AND MOST DISTASTEFUL POSITION POSSIBLE", of me having to look a sorry ass, no hometraining, unemployed or underemployed, disrespectful, lying, cheating, abusive, low class, bail-jumping, drug dealing, weed smoking, gang banging, repeat offender, self-destructive, single parent-making ass, two-time loser in the face and tell me that she's more interested in HIM and what he has to offer (which is WHAT? Bankruptcy? A mental breakdown? lifelong financial hardship? DEATH and or DISMEMBERMENT?) than what I have to offer, which is a safe environment, stability, love, commitment, monogamy, friendship, and loyalty?

You damn right I'm going to take my business elsewhere if there isn't an available sister of sound mind and body. You must be crazy if you think I'm going to sit here and commit myself to a life of solitude and celibacy mainly not because of there not being any available sisters but because they, more often than not, are too picky for their own damn good. So, when Shaniqua, Ebony and Charlene think they're too good for me when they don't have any desirable prospects I'll holla at Atsuko, Carmelita or Becky.




You just don't get it. And you're grown, right? Therefore SET in your mind. If you don't get it by now, and by being black, then you just WON'T get it. I understand now. There's no point in debating a topic with people that don't inherently "get it". You have to have a BASIC tendency to empathize and place yourself in the other's shoes. You don't empathize. You administer arrogant spiteful "tests" to provide yourself with so-called "proof" of your twisted mindset.

You're right. I'm twisted. Call me crazy but I don't see the logic in being passed over or ignored by my own race of women for superficial reasons or for reasons of inferiority or low self-esteem as a definition of being true to my people. For whatever reason some sisters pass me over is irrelevent considering I have no undesirable traits (i.e. ex con, unemployed, single father, etc.). But I'm supposed to be punished because I don't act black enough (the fuck is that?) or because I don't segregate myself from nonblack human beings or allow myself to be subjected to displaced anger for something I've never done? Last time I checked Jesus Christ died for our sins. He carried the cross for us so I shouldn't have to carry it but many jaded, spiteful, confused black women see otherwise.

So, tell me, when your co-worker reacted to the "favor" you asked of her, did you take notes on her facial expression? How did she walk off? I know you said she played it off nice-nice at first. Was it that same day or the next when you realized that she didn't do what you'd asked of her? Did you take any bets on whether or not she would? Which side did you bet on? Just curious. Of course, you knew from the jump that she wasn't going to do it, though. You just wanted to ask her anyway so you could play with her head, no?....the "depths of her psyche"....You wanted to conduct an experiment of your own in the same vein as the barbydoll one.... Or maybe you just wanted to take her down a peg or two if she was holding her head a little too high around the office that day. Was that it?

Umm, no. actually it was the *RING ON HER WEDDING FINGER* that detered me from asking her out first. You see, she was a very attractive woman but I've been raised not to pursue married women. Whether she was truly married or single is irrelevent. The fact that out of four other naked fingers she had a ring on her RING finger mislead me to think otherwise. And I sure as hell ain't going to ask a woman with a ring on her ring finger if she's married. If she's vane enough to think she's so damn hot she needs to wear a fake ring to fight off all the dudes (which is lame because a dog will chase a woman whether she's married or single), then she was never my type to begin with. So with that being said, you're way off base. Have a nice day.
quote:
Originally posted by HonestBrother:
quote:
Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
You want to know why I don't acknowledge your ramblings, rants, and wishy washy, yes ma'am rhetoric, honestboy? Because the first comment I read of yours was when you whinned like a little girl about not knowing how to socialize in Kentucky and Ebonyrose clowned you - told you to get out of Kentucky.




So let's get something straight. Smile

You invite your co-workers to happy hour because you're such a good guy and want to boost morale (unity and team cohesiveness). This is indeed admirable ....

But then you come in here and take (very) cheap shots at people and do anything but boost morale?

What's your problem?

I mean, come on, my dear Brother Romulus. Dearest Brother. Smile

Time and again, you refer to that same old post of mine (which reflects very little of my life). Namely ... just like the women you criticize, you hang on to one little itty bit thing ... that you think you can use against me later to your advantage.

I.e., You've shown yourself to be both petty and vindictive. You're also overly emotional.

For someone who is supposedly having such a great time with your life you seem to have some real deep emotional scars. So much so that you seem to enjoy inflicting pain. Or at least pathetically trying to inflict pain.

I'm on to you. And I'm not going to react the way you want me to. Because I'm not who you think I am. I don't recognize myself in what you posted. So why should I react to your ignorance and petty spitefulness?


What's your problem?

You want a hug? hug


PS: Note that in my post I referred to "history within living memory".


Gay.
quote:

So let's get something straight. Smile

You invite your co-workers to happy hour because you're such a good guy and want to boost morale (unity and team cohesiveness). This is indeed admirable ....

But then you come in here and take (very) cheap shots at people and do anything but boost morale?

What's your problem?


I mean, come on, my dear Brother Romulus. Dearest Brother. Smile

Time and again, you refer to that same old post of mine (which reflects very little of my life). Namely ... just like the women you criticize, you hang on to one little itty bit thing ... that you think you can use against me later to your advantage.

I.e., You've shown yourself to be both petty and vindictive. You're also overly emotional.

For someone who is supposedly having such a great time with your life you seem to have some real deep emotional scars. So much so that you seem to enjoy inflicting pain.



Happy?

I cut out the "gay" parts ... Big Grin
quote:
Originally posted by Khalliqa:
quote:
Originally posted by ZAKAR:
SO DOES THESE EXAMPLE SUGGEST BLACK MEN DONT THINK THEIR WOMEN ARE BEAUTIFUL??


Uhh... yep...

Black men (In GENERAL) like mixed women.... or anywhere near there or WHITE... when they can't get that... they settle for whatever is nice and available... or.. they become ultra radical and their brains are force fed the image of black women as beautiful and they began to talk "black is beautiful" and sleep with white women or continue to covet mixed women....

this creates jealousy, insecurity and inferiority complexes in the women of their stock... and they turn to these women and say brilliant uniting things like:

stop being jealous, insecure... and your problem is you're too fat.. got too many children (from men that are available and have mastered macking ala' RR )stuff like that...

quote:
DO BLACK WOMEN NEED WHITE MEN TO TELL THEM THEY ARE BEAUTIFUL??? DOES THAT VALIDATE THEM?


Many are getting to that point... and feeling validated by it...

SHango aint here so I will repeat... I understand that feeling... once at work you can't help but compare the different treatment...
-------------------------------------------------------

Erm... there has NEVER been a generation of "DARK SKIN, KINKY HAIRED FEMALE IS IN!" phase... lol...

but we are in a dark skin male is HOT phase....

shoot even in slavery black men were considered so attractive their women had to be protected... erm... nobody was protected from the "beauty" of the kinky haired black woman... she was game...

so that tit for tat ish don't fly...

its not reality...
-------------------------------------------------------

Why isn't your question directed towards your brethren and asking them why the heck their tastes runs towards the fairer woman.... I bet you'll find your answer if you began there...

=======================================================

Honestly HB... my statements are not a call to reject lighter skinned women... its simply to be honest and admit that colorism exists heavy in the black male mind... and if one wants to know why many black women are turning coat... its because they are desperately trying to find acceptance without feeling lonely...

black men have rejected many of us...

and many sisters are choosing to fly to the enemy... and the black male response is denial... or more put downs...

so... we have a large segment of the black female community that feels rejected....

even in relationships...


yeah

What's up with the denial? And using the example of interracial 'marriage' being at a low rate, when 'marriage' isn't gonna even be a reality for the majority of Black women doesn't prove a damn thing about beauty prefferences. Statistically, it is a FACT that brothers date inter-racially at exponentially higher rates than sisters, period.(It was posted on here a long time ago). Because we live in a white supremacist patriarchal society, the 'European beauty standard' is going to effect African/Black women at a greater rate because women in general are automatically 'coveted' for their looks more than men, and African/Black women are the furthest from said beauty standard when it comes to phenotype.

A segment of All women like brothers, and in fact chase after, seek out, and throw themselves at them. A far larger segment of ALL men covet the white woman. The same cannot be said about African/Black women, period. Also, the same white supremacist teachings that give dark skinned women(and Blacks and non-white women in general) the idea that white is better, prettier, ect, just couldn't be possibly making the MEN prefer the Barbie look too huh? Would women be perming their hair ect. if brothers didn't respond to it? I actually know women who want to go natural but are afraid to because their friends that did, had a drastic and obvious drop in male interest. So why is there confusion and denial? When are we going to deal with the reality of the shituation? This ish is being DONE TO US by an outside force that does not have our best interests in mind. They want us to hate ourselves and hate each other. But we ALL have to take responsibility where responsibility is due. Yes, women have colourism issues and self hatred issues too. Yes, African/Black women date inter-racially and go on sex tours too. But... and this is a big BUT, the numbers on who participates in said behavior(colourism in dating preferences, and sex tourism) based on gender, is not equal. Unless we want to openly discuss this reality and why it is a phenomenon, then what's the point?
quote:

They grow up with that same mentality buried deep in their psyche and it manifests itself in the way they try to emulate as much eurocentricity in their hairstyles and the millions they put into trying to look white.


As a woman with natural hair, that used to wear weaves, I can tell you that blk men are just as screwed up as blk women when it comes to hair and european standard of beauty.
Blk women are trying to attract blk men! Blk men are the last ones to date out. So, when a blk woman sees another blk woman blonde weaved and with YT facial features get favorable attention from the blk men, how can you not understand why some blk women go that route.

If the majority of blk men went after ladies like myself, more blk women would wear natural styles. They would stop telling me that I'm brave for having locs and that they would love to go natural but their man ain't having it.



quote:

.... Brothers like me wouldn't have had to give women of other races and nationalities the time of day if sisters' standard of attraction wasn't such a skewed and gross misrepresentation of manhood and masculinity.


So, brothers like you date other races as a second choice? You don't date for love but just because the women you want arent up to par? That's insulting to the non black women you meet.
I would never apologize or make excuses for dating interacially. You sound like something is wrong with it.
quote:
Originally posted by ladyj:

Blk women are trying to attract blk men! Blk men are the last ones to date out. So, when a blk woman sees another blk woman blonde weaved and with YT facial features get favorable attention from the blk men, how can you not understand why some blk women go that route.

You're trying to justify black women getting weaves and perms through giving in to inadvertent peer pressure? HA HA HA HA HA!!!! How childish does that sound and what does that say about black women? And be honest with yourself - you sisters say you're so strong and independent and a brother better "take me as I am" but you're saying black women are so adherent, superficial and simple-minded that they'd actually WANT the attention of brothers that would pursue FAUX FEM SISTERS? I think I can speak for the real brothers in saying that I would prefer a sister with a short neat fro than long flowing weaved or permed hair, especially considering the last few sisters I've dated were African (not counting the one bobble head African American sister I dated in recent history).

If the majority of blk men went after ladies like myself, more blk women would wear natural styles. They would stop telling me that I'm brave for having locs and that they would love to go natural but their man ain't having it.

Then their men are full of shit. I've dated sisters with real locs and fake locs and it didn't bother me at all in fact I was more attracted to them because they were more confident and layed back. In fact, my ex, who's Zimbabwahian, did hair on the side in addition to her professional job. All she did was braid extentions. One of the only issues that was a deal-breaker for me was she spent all night every night doing womens' hair. There were other issues but that's another story. But you can't take that domographic of superficial, fake brothers and lump us all into one category. If a sister I dated had permed or weaved hair it wouldn't be an issue with me but I'd prefer natural hair.

So, brothers like you date other races as a second choice? You don't date for love but just because the women you want arent up to par? That's insulting to the non black women you meet.
I would never apologize or make excuses for dating interacially. You sound like something is wrong with it.

Now you're putting words in my mouth. First of all, I said no such garbage as the black women I've encountered as not being up to par. Secondly, I date women who are single and AVAILABLE (Key word being AVAILABLE). If I run into 50 black women and they're all married or have boyfriends, then what the hell am I supposed to do? Hump a blowup doll? Go to church and pray on it? Write a letter to some T.V. evangelist? Please. The same would apply if I ran into 50 white, latino or Asian women - if they were all married or had boyfriends I would be S.O.L. until I come across the next available woman whether she be BLACK, white, hispanic or asian.

And get this straight: When I involve myself with a non-black woman I involve myself with her because I'm attracted to her - because we have common interests, goals, aspirations, at the very least sexual compatability NOT because she was my second choice. In other words I pursue non-black women and hold them to the same standards as I would black women. Furthermore, I meant what I said in my previous post. If more sisters made themselves available instead of finding MORE reasons NOT to date than to get out there and socialize, brothers like me wouldn't have to venture outside of our race to find love. Also understand that I don't date any one race or nationality of woman exclusively. I don't prefer any one race or nationality of woman over another. It's all about love, compatability, trust and respect - end of story.
What's up with the denial? And using the example of interracial 'marriage' being at a low rate, when 'marriage' isn't gonna even be a reality for the majority of Black women doesn't prove a damn thing about beauty prefferences

What preferences are you talking about sista? who sets the standards? are you gonna tell me the europeans who control the mainstream media which is white supremist in nature, should portray black women as the standard of beautity. They are pushing their agenda, they want to portray themselves and their women as the standard of beauty. If black women cant find it within themseleves to love themselves, they will always suffer from self hate. 9 out of 10 black women straighten their hair and wear weave. Black men are not responsible for that? Blond hair? COme on. Black woman have to take some dam responsibility for their self esteem issues. Love yourself first black woman ,then you can love someone else!Also I dont know what men all of you women are referring to, but maybe you should try a different type of brother. Or maybe that weave and those contacts you wear attract a certain type of man. But I for one as well as many brothers I know , love our black women naturally the way god made them, be it if they are light skinned or dark chocolate!!!
quote:
that right? Then seems to me the Black man hasn't been doing his job properly, probably cause he's too busy looking over our shoulders at anyone who isn't Black


Where did you get this nonesense from sista. Maybe you have self esteem issues. Most black men are not looking over their shoulder for a none black woman, most brothers want a black woman to love themselves and love their men for who and what they are. But seems to me a lot of black women are so caught up in what white women and other women are doing they loose sight of whats really going on. Stop trying to make yourself over into an honoray white woman and love yourself for who you are, you didnt come from the white woman, she came from you.

don't see any such laws either, nor did I refer to one. The point is, the black woman can WANT TO DATE whomever ALL DAY LONG, but she CAN NOT DATE anyone who doesn't want to date HER. Get it now? If the general consensus is that dark and kinky is not desirable in women (while the same is NOT TRUE of the black man's desirability), then THIS IS WHERE THE BLACK WOMAN GATHERS HER INFORMATION FROM. We didn't dream it up, we're not making it up. It is what it is. And you have to have GOOD PARENTS to COUNTER the information that black children receive
Again why in the hell are you worried about how none black people view you . Love yourself, fuck them/ Truth be told all men secretly desire black women. But they know society stigmatizes black people period. so he makes you a sex thing or a piece he wants late at night when no one can identify him. But again, if you black women do not find out who the hell they really are and begin to love themselves like god made the, there will be nothing a black man can do or the community as a whole to change the self hate that deep down inside. There is nothing wrong with kinky hair black woman, your hair doesnt have to be straight. In fact it looks rediculous on you!
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fro Brotha Zakar...you bring out some excellent points. I agree Black women should love themselves first. And that's not somethin' that's natural. It's learned behavior. And if your surroundings depicts something TOTAL opposite of that love...then it's hard growing up with self-love. However, once you understand the dynamics of european manipulation in terms of colorism and caste classification and really UNDERSTAND what that means then you can pull yourself beyond that. BUT! If that's not an option or if you DON'T KNOW you have an option then it difficult rising above the beauty propaganda and as a result low self esteem develops. That's why KNOWLEDGE...especially self knowledge is soooo important. If you don't know who you are and where you come from....how can you LOVE yourself?....especially since it may appear that your immediate surroundings doesn't. And children are sensitive to their surroundings. So if it's [love] not there in their beginnings...how can they develop into it without the mirroring examples from other sources within their nucleus[family & community]? JMHO plus two cents. fro
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quote:
Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
quote:
Originally posted by ladyj:

Blk women are trying to attract blk men! Blk men are the last ones to date out. So, when a blk woman sees another blk woman blonde weaved and with YT facial features get favorable attention from the blk men, how can you not understand why some blk women go that route.


quote:
Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
You're trying to justify black women getting weaves and perms through giving in to inadvertent peer pressure? HA HA HA HA HA!!!! How childish does that sound and what does that say about black women? And be honest with yourself - you sisters say you're so strong and independent and a brother better "take me as I am" but you're saying black women are so adherent, superficial and simple-minded that they'd actually WANT the attention of brothers that would pursue FAUX FEM SISTERS? I think I can speak for the real brothers in saying that I would prefer a sister with a short neat fro than long flowing weaved or permed hair, especially considering the last few sisters I've dated were African (not counting the one bobble head African American sister I dated in recent history).



some blk women get weaves and relaxers because alot of blk do like prefer it. some do it to look more YT. some do it because its easier to deal with that their texture of hair. some do it because they like certains styles and those happen to be straight styles.
i never said i was so strong and independent and take me as i am ( im new to this board BTW). i said in the core all women just want to be loved and thought of as attractive. if nappy hair was the in thing, YTs and asians would be getting afro perms.

quote:
Originally posted by ladyj:
If the majority of blk men went after ladies like myself, more blk women would wear natural styles. They would stop telling me that I'm brave for having locs and that they would love to go natural but their man ain't having it.


quote:
Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
Then their men are full of shit. I've dated sisters with real locs and fake locs and it didn't bother me at all in fact I was more attracted to them because they were more confident and layed back. In fact, my ex, who's Zimbabwahian, did hair on the side in addition to her professional job. All she did was braid extentions. One of the only issues that was a deal-breaker for me was she spent all night every night doing womens' hair. There were other issues but that's another story. But you can't take that domographic of superficial, fake brothers and lump us all into one category. If a sister I dated had permed or weaved hair it wouldn't be an issue with me but I'd prefer natural hair.


i agree that their men are full of shit. what is a woman of any race to do if they want to attract men? become more attractive to the type of man she wants.
im glad there are a few brothers like you out there that like natural hair styles but im not naive or blind to the fact that i lost alot of prospects because i chose to wear locs. i was smart enough to do it after i was with someone a long time.
i wore a weave a few months ago, when i went on a trip, and i was taken back by all the attention i was now getting. someone was actually happy that ( they thought) i cut my locs off.

B]blk men and women are both screwed up and brainwashed when its comes to hair. lets not blame it all on the women.[/B]

quote:
Originally posted by ladyj:
So, brothers like you date other races as a second choice? You don't date for love but just because the women you want arent up to par? That's insulting to the non black women you meet.
I would never apologize or make excuses for dating interacially. You sound like something is wrong with it.


quote:
Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
Now you're putting words in my mouth. First of all, I said no such garbage as the black women I've encountered as not being up to par. Secondly, I date women who are single and AVAILABLE (Key word being AVAILABLE). If I run into 50 black women and they're all married or have boyfriends, then what the hell am I supposed to do? Hump a blowup doll? Go to church and pray on it? Write a letter to some T.V. evangelist? Please. The same would apply if I ran into 50 white, latino or Asian women - if they were all married or had boyfriends I would be S.O.L. until I come across the next available woman whether she be BLACK, white, hispanic or asian.

And get this straight: When I involve myself with a non-black woman I involve myself with her because I'm attracted to her - because we have common interests, goals, aspirations, at the very least sexual compatability NOT because she was my second choice. In other words I pursue non-black women and hold them to the same standards as I would black women. Furthermore, I meant what I said in my previous post. If more sisters made themselves available instead of finding MORE reasons NOT to date than to get out there and socialize, brothers like me wouldn't have to venture outside of our race to find love. Also understand that I don't date any one race or nationality of woman exclusively. I don't prefer any one race or nationality of woman over another. It's all about love, compatability, trust and respect - end of story.


i aint ask you alla-that. lol.
i have no problem with interracial love. i have a problem when someone tries to blame my sistas for the reason to date other races. especially since, blks should be the 1st ones rejecting stereotypes.

how am i putting words in your mouth? you said:
quote:
Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:.... Brothers like me wouldn't have had to give women of other races and nationalities the time of day if sisters' standard of attraction wasn't such a skewed and gross misrepresentation of manhood and masculinity.


"brothers wouldnt have to"? you dont have to do a damn thing. that sounds like you are being pushed away by blk women. (poor baby, romulus) you are blaming blk women for the reason to date non blk because sistas "standard of attraction" is "skwewed".

maybe you tyoed it wrong? i dunno, thats how i read it.


all this blaming is getting blks nowhere. a person needs to recognize the reason they do the things they do and either take responsibilty or stop doing it.
quote:
quote: Suz
Is that right? Then seems to me the Black man hasn't been doing his job properly, probably cause he's too busy looking over our shoulders at anyone who isn't Black

from: Zakar
Where did you get this nonesense from sista. Maybe you have self esteem issues. Most black men are not looking over their shoulder for a none black woman, most brothers want a black woman to love themselves and love their men for who and what they are. But seems to me a lot of black women are so caught up in what white women and other women are doing they loose sight of whats really going on. Stop trying to make yourself over into an honoray white woman and love yourself for who you are, you didnt come from the white woman, she came from you.



Aw damn, look at the twisted little head games being played up in hea. LOL, brotha's chasing women of other races in which btw now-a-days you've even expanded your selection to Hispanic women I see, & this is because what you say? We have self esteem issues & haven't learned how to love ourselves? LOL!! Sista's have you ever heard so much bs in your lives? Now I've got to tell ya, no other race of men put their women down & go chasing other races of women more than Black men do, yet you claim it's the Black women who have self esteem issues, babe ya really got it twisted. I know Black women have their share of faults but where the confusion or should I say the illusions come in is where Black men seem to feel we're the only one's that do. Somehow all other races of women are exempt in their eyes, & for that reason alone we will always be at odds. And where you get the idea Black women are trying to mimic white women is totally off based, so much so that I can't even entertain the thought of expanding on the conversation. Some of you Black men seem to feel you know it all, but judging by your post baby you've got a whole lot more to learn, you are on ground zero, better yet, minus zero.
quote:
Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
Yep. That's about right. If a black woman puts me in the "TACKIEST AND MOST DISTASTEFUL POSITION POSSIBLE", of me having to look a sorry ass, no hometraining, unemployed or underemployed, disrespectful, lying, cheating, abusive, low class, bail-jumping, drug dealing, weed smoking, gang banging, repeat offender, self-destructive, single parent-making ass, two-time loser in the face and tell me that she's more interested in HIM and what he has to offer (which is WHAT? Bankruptcy? A mental breakdown? lifelong financial hardship? DEATH and or DISMEMBERMENT?) than what I have to offer, which is a safe environment, stability, love, commitment, monogamy, friendship, and loyalty?

~So you were trying to get back at her? For something SHE herself had done to you, or were you projecting your past issues with OTHER women onto her? If SHE passed you up for a thug, just brush your shoulders off and move on. She's got issues that you don't need to take on....unless you are one of those "savior" types that get off on women like that (a power trip type of relationship). See, you are guilty of EXACTLY what so many black men accuse US of. You, my friend, are a BITTER BLACK MAN. You have to let that mess go, the same way that you expect us to. You have BAGGAGE. So, one would THINK that this would make YOU one of the more understanding types of brothas out there. Hmmmmm.~

You damn right I'm going to take my business elsewhere if there isn't an available sister of sound mind and body. You must be crazy if you think I'm going to sit here and commit myself to a life of solitude and celibacy mainly not because of there not being any available sisters but because they, more often than not, are too picky for their own damn good. So, when Shaniqua, Ebony and Charlene think they're too good for me when they don't have any desirable prospects I'll holla at Atsuko, Carmelita or Becky.



~If that's your experience, I can't argue with it. Do you wonder WHY you attract or are attracted to the type of woman who is too picky? I mean, for you to KEEP running into this type of black woman, to the extreme extent that it causes you to "take your business elsewhere" (to date interracially), then.....somethings not right. NO desirable (black women) prospects? 19....NONE at all? That's hard to believe. Maybe YOU are too picky.~

You're right. I'm twisted. Call me crazy but I don't see the logic in being passed over or ignored by my own race of women for superficial reasons or for reasons of inferiority or low self-esteem as a definition of being true to my people. For whatever reason some sisters pass me over is irrelevent considering I have no undesirable traits (i.e. ex con, unemployed, single father, etc.). But I'm supposed to be punished because I don't act black enough (the fuck is that?) or because I don't segregate myself from nonblack human beings or allow myself to be subjected to displaced anger for something I've never done? Last time I checked Jesus Christ died for our sins. He carried the cross for us so I shouldn't have to carry it but many jaded, spiteful, confused black women see otherwise.

~Aaaahh...but you did the same thing to ol'girl at the office, though. Unless SHE was the shallow one who passed you up for thuglove, you shouldn't have attempted to take your frustrations out on her. You knew she wasn't going to let you punk her and actually help you get with that white-hispanic woman. nonolol!~


Umm, no. actually it was the *RING ON HER WEDDING FINGER* that detered me from asking her out first. You see, she was a very attractive woman but I've been raised not to pursue married women. Whether she was truly married or single is irrelevent. The fact that out of four other naked fingers she had a ring on her RING finger mislead me to think otherwise. And I sure as hell ain't going to ask a woman with a ring on her ring finger if she's married. If she's vane enough to think she's so damn hot she needs to wear a fake ring to fight off all the dudes (which is lame because a dog will chase a woman whether she's married or single), then she was never my type to begin with.

~WOW!LOL!You say it doesn't matter, or that it's "irrelevant", but OBVIOUSLY that is not the case. You read as much (A LOT)into her four bare fingers as you did into her ringed finger. As in, "out of ALL the fingers she had available to her for ring wear, she chose the RING finger." And why take it so personal? If she does this thing to APPEAR married for the (vain) reason that you specified, then it is not necessarily an affront to YOU to keep YOU SPECIFICALLY away. You sound crazy trying to be the Club President for all the angry brothers who see right through her ring trick! Let her BE vain, and brush your shoulders off. Admit it, why don't you? YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO THIS TYPE OF WOMAN. "She was a very attractive woman" you say,...but, SO attractive that you just KNOW she has to be the type to play the "ring trick", and she's SO attractive that she's picky enough to pass you up, just because she's so beautiful that she CAN. And THEN when you're not attracted to THAT type, you're going after the one who want what you're NOT (lying, cheating, abusive, bail-jumping...etc, etcetera). Look at the man in the mirror, guy.~

So with that being said, you're way off base. Have a nice day.
[/QUOTE]

~Okay. Thanks, and you do the same. thanks
quote:
Originally posted by ZAKAR:
What's up with the denial? And using the example of interracial 'marriage' being at a low rate, when 'marriage' isn't gonna even be a reality for the majority of Black women doesn't prove a damn thing about beauty prefferences

What preferences are you talking about sista? who sets the standards? are you gonna tell me the europeans who control the mainstream media which is white supremist in nature, should portray black women as the standard of beautity. They are pushing their agenda, they want to portray themselves and their women as the standard of beauty.


I realize this and have stated it before. What I am saying is that just like this propoganda effects what women try to look like(which I do not support) brothers 'prefferences' are equally effected. I'm not talking about you, you make it quite clear you don't think that way... But you are not the majority. Our people in general are on 'someone else's agenda' in many areas. Romantic relationships are no exception...

quote:
If black women cant find it within themselves to love themselves, they will always suffer from self hate. 9 out of 10 black women straighten their hair and wear weave. Black men are not responsible for that? Blond hair? COme on. Black woman have to take some dam responsibility for their self esteem issues. Love yourself first black woman ,then you can love someone else! Also I dont know what men all of you women are referring to, but maybe you should try a different type of brother. Or maybe that weave and those contacts you wear attract a certain type of man. But I for one as well as many brothers I know , love our black women naturally the way god made them, be it if they are light skinned or dark chocolate!!!


Honestly, Bro. Zakar, I have a ton of friends who have had their dating lives suffer once they decided to go natural. It's quite sad actually. I know that they are probably getting quality over quantity(and I tell them this), but seriously, as a woman, in a lot of places, if you choose to be natural your dating life suffers big time. I've seen and heard it too many times.

I agree that Blondes, weaves, contacts, and anything that is an attempt at changing the actual African phenotype is a huge sign of self hatred. But many a brother thinks that look(particularly the hair) is fly.
If men were as attracted to "lighter" skin as much of you proclaim, then dark skinned people would be very rare, or damn near extinct. So let's cut the bs, we all know, BLACK aint going nowhere. Razz


O.k. now... so back to this double-standard.

These sly women have sat in here and justified these romantic vacations without nary a concern for being exposed as hypocrites.

And right on schedule, someone brought in the "these poor black women don't have a black man to run to" sentiment.

This is all too telling. You women aren't concerned with love. You ladies are about GAMES. That's the only reason you can justify this crap, and point the finger at black men, for not "loving" you. Childish.

When you women wake up and realize that men aren't falling for the manipulative mindplay?

I wish a mofo would tell me... "well if you loved me then...

HA!!!

This aint got nothing to do with love.
-----------------------------------------

So black women are attracted to Italian men...

hmm 19

Don't they have more racial slurs for us than we have last names?

Interesting 19
quote:
You read as much (A LOT)into her four bare fingers as you did into her ringed finger. As in, "out of ALL the fingers she had available to her for ring wear, she chose the RING finger." And why take it so personal? If she does this thing to APPEAR married for the (vain) reason that you specified, then it is not necessarily an affront to YOU to keep YOU SPECIFICALLY away. You sound crazy trying to be the Club President for all the angry brothers who see right through her ring trick! Let her BE vain, and brush your shoulders off. Admit it, why don't you? YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO THIS TYPE OF WOMAN. "She was a very attractive woman" you say,...but, SO attractive that you just KNOW she has to be the type to play the "ring trick",


Excuse me brothers but did y'all read this? I mean actually READ this? This is another one of those damned if you do and damned if you don't games women like to play that only results in them being ALONE.

Damn all this explanation and justification. If you a grown ass woman and you playing "ring tricks", then you deserve to be sitting at home alone on a Friday night - on your bed choking on Bon Bons, chocolate chip cookies, and potato chips while looking at taped re-runs of 'The Young and the Restless' and wearing your favorite pair of goofy ass, puffy white socks with pink toes and heels, and Noxema smeared all over your face.

Forgive me for having this little handicap called MORALS and INTEGRITY but I don't ask women that have a ring on their wedding finger if they're single. That's some typical fickle woman shit just like the dress issue. You can't tell a woman the truth and say she looks fat in the dress - you can't lie and tell her she looks good or she'll deny she looks good in the dress and change into another one. But if you don't say SHIT when she asks you what she looks like in a certain dress, then you're a low-down, dirty bastard that doesn't give her any attention.

Same deal with the ring. Fools think you're supposed to read their mind. If you acknowledge the ring and don't ask her out, then she gets mad. You ask her if she's married and she's wearing a fake ass ring she gets pissed. You ask her if she's single and the ring is REAL, then you're REALLY a low-down, dirty, womanizing, ho-hopping bastard. damned if you do, damned if you don't.
quote:
Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
Same deal with the ring. Fools think you're supposed to read their mind. If you acknowledge the ring and don't ask her out, then she gets mad. You ask her if she's married and she's wearing a fake ass ring she gets pissed. You ask her if she's single and the ring is REAL, then you're REALLY a low-down, dirty, womanizing, ho-hopping bastard. damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Just thought some of the brothers might like to know an easy way around this ring problem.

Since you're having casual conversation anyway, just ask her some questions about her husband and start a conversation about him. What does he do? Where is he from? Where did you two meet? ect...

If she doesn't actually have a husband it'll come out, and in a way that won't be embarrassing for either party. She'll say something like, "Oh I'm not married, I just wear this ring so guys aren't asking me out all the time." If she does have a husband you can have a nice little convo about him then go on your way, and she's not left thinking you're a total ass because you were only interested in talking to her when you thought she might be available. Married women like to know that they're still being seen as desireable by other men. It's also a sign of confidence (which most sane women find attractive) to not assume rejection.

This works with boyfriends too. A lot of women condition themselves to "mention a boyfriend" in the first couple of minutes of talking to a guy they just met... whether they have one or not. They do this for a couple reasons...

1. She wants to appear desirable and not desperate.

2. She wants him to believe she has back up.

3. She wants to know if he'll tuck-tail and run at the first sign of any competition.

When she does this, just talk with her for a bit about her boyfriend, then steer the convo on to something else. Give her a few more minutes to decide she likes the attention, then bring the boyfriend back into the convo. She's likely to say something like, "Oh he's not really my boyfriend... he's just a friend."

She may say that even if the guy she mentioned really is her boyfriend. Wink

Either way... problem solved. Cool
BV, I can understand the second reason why the woman wears a ring to get unwanted guys off her back. Why the first one? Desirable and not desperate. She has a ring on her finger, so she's already desirable to somebody, at least to the untrained eye.

But the third one, I don't understand. If he'll tuck tail and run from the "competition", isn't that a good thing? Men already have a bad rep as it is talking to single women. Why mess up someone's marriage? If I see a woman with a ring on her ring finger, I'm not going to pursue her. I'm not trying to be a homewrecker. Besides, that stuff comes back around.
...and why fool with the first-tier "say you have a boyfriend, but if he's (the inquisitor) persistent and you like him, then admit that you don't" response?"

if anything, that may make you suspect her veracity right at the outset. Let's just all be adults about it, engage in some good conversation and see if attraction grows?

I'd think when most men observe most woman, a nuanced glance at her left hand is part of the deal. It can (should?) establishe the tone of any conversation going forward.
quote:
Originally posted by HonestBrother:
quote:
Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
than what I have to offer, which is a safe environment, stability, love, commitment, monogamy, friendship, and loyalty?



WOW! Eek

Do you really have all those things to offer? Smile

******************************************************
sounds like a short list. i did note in one post romulus said he was datin a zimbabwahian woman who did hair on the side in addition to a professional job. seems like if he was so diserable she would snatch him right up and not have to work around the clock. she must have not trusted the "stability" part of what he has to offer. but perhaps i am mistaking what he means.
he didn't say financial security.
honestbrother if you are a young man sounds like you do have yo head on straight. keep on keepin on.
quote:
Originally posted by Huey:
BV, I can understand the second reason why the woman wears a ring to get unwanted guys off her back. Why the first one? Desirable and not desperate. She has a ring on her finger, so she's already desirable to somebody, at least to the untrained eye.

Sorry if I didn't make myself clear, Huey. The "appearing desirable and not desperate" motivation is in reference to mentioning a boyfriend in the first two minutes of conversation... not wearing a fake/real wedding ring. These are two different behaviors women exhibit, done for two different reasons.

quote:
But the third one, I don't understand. If he'll tuck tail and run from the "competition", isn't that a good thing?

On the surface you'd think so... but no, it's not a good thing. No woman wants a man who's going to buckle under at the first sign of resistance to getting what he wants. Just remember that if your going to have a long term relationship with any woman... you'll be competing for her every day of your life, and for the rest of your life.

That's not a bad thing though... keeps you sharp. Cool

quote:
Why mess up someone's marriage? If I see a woman with a ring on her ring finger, I'm not going to pursue her. I'm not trying to be a homewrecker. Besides, that stuff comes back around.

That's not what I'm talking about at all. I'm talking about women who wear "fake" wedding rings because they're not really married. Also, the above reference to competition was aimed at a boyfriend, not a husband. Boyfriends are, for many women, as interchangeable as a pair of shoes. Some more than others... but basically they get worn until they wear out or she finds a nicer pair. And if she finds a nicer pair before the first pair wears out then so much the better! lol

When I was younger, I use to think that all the beautiful women had boyfriends. I was wrong... ALL women have boyfriends. They can easily make any relationship with a man more or less serious as the situation warrants in their minds. Even a totally anti-social wallflower can and will make up a boyfriend out of thin air if she suddenly feels the need to be more desirable and less desperate... such as when a real flesh and blood man that she's interested in starts talking to her.

Point being... if you can't or won't compete with her boyfriend(s), real or imagined, you've already lost the battle.
quote:
Point being... if you can't or won't compete with her boyfriend(s), real or imagined, you've already lost the battle.


******************************************************
exactly, she may be just kicking it with mr alright until mr right comes along.
but if she is totally in love with the one she is with you can do back flips thru fiery hoops with golds nuggets shootin out yo azz. she's gonna say "i'm flattered but... i got a man"
from: HeruStar

quote:
If men were as attracted to "lighter" skin as much of you proclaim, then dark skinned people would be very rare, or damn near extinct. So let's cut the bs, we all know, BLACK aint going nowhere.


O.k. now... so back to this double-standard.

These sly women have sat in here and justified these romantic vacations without nary a concern for being exposed as hypocrites.

Excuse me, sly women? What's there to be sly about or should we just call a spade a spade by using the word slick. I ain't feeling ya bro, what hypocracy, break it down?

And right on schedule, someone brought in the "these poor black women don't have a black man to run to" sentiment.

This is all too telling. You women aren't concerned with love. You ladies are about GAMES. That's the only reason you can justify this crap, and point the finger at black men, for not "loving" you. Childish.

When you women wake up and realize that men aren't falling for the manipulative mindplay?

What head games? If they can't get dates, if they sit home alone on the weekends don't you think they're entitled to have some fun & enjoy themselves sometime? Or do you think they should sit around, head hung down low crying woe is me? Some of you black men some kinda way have been put on a imaginary pedestal by some desparate dumbass black woman somewhere, & now you seem to think that if we don't suck up just right, begging for your attention that we're damned, & forever will be doomed to be alone. Nigga puh-lease!! Well I'm here to tell ya, you don't mean that much, life goes on with or without you, damn if any black woman should sit around waiting for playa Tyrone to get around to giving her some attention. Those women went to Italy as part of a tour group with mutiple destinations & activities & there's nothing wrong with that. What is she suppose to do if she wants to go on vacation, pick up the tab for broke-back freeloading Tyrone who ain't got a pot to piss in or a window to through it out, living at home in his mama's house? Ain't nothing happening, no dick is gold plated, no not one. Her silent message is screw yall & the beat up bomb you came driving in.

I wish a mofo would tell me... "well if you loved me then...

HA!!!

Hey babe, I seriously doubt you've got anything to worry about.

This aint got nothing to do with love.
-----------------------------------------

For once you're right, it's got to do with her wanting to have something to look forward to, it's called vacationing. Something a lot of black men ain't got a dime to do.

So black women are attracted to Italian men...

hmm

Don't they have more racial slurs for us than we have last names?

No, that would be the caucasians here in the USA, remember that the next time you go grinning & skinning in their faces ok.

Interesting

Yup, it damn sure is.
Damn all this explanation and justification. If you a grown ass woman and you playing "ring tricks", then you deserve to be sitting at home alone on a Friday night - on your bed choking on Bon Bons, chocolate chip cookies, and potato chips while looking at taped re-runs of 'The Young and the Restless' and wearing your favorite pair of goofy ass, puffy white socks with pink toes and heels, and Noxema smeared all over your face.

~Awww! Po'thang! I guess that WOULD hurt a bit to know that even though she's alone at night stuffing her noxema creamed face with bonbons, SHE STILL would rather use the "ring trick" to keep YOU AWAY. Ouch!~

Forgive me for having this little handicap called MORALS and INTEGRITY but I don't ask women that have a ring on their wedding finger if they're single.

~Nor should you. That's good manners. Now, take your morals and integrity one step further and allow her her personal space. If she'd rather be seen as married when she isn't, then she has her personal reasons. Respect them. What's it to you? Bottom line is SHE IS UNAVAILABLE by CHOICE. HER CHOICE. She's allowed to do that. She's off limits, be it for real reasons or fake ones, and it doesn't really matter WHICH in the end does it? The end result is still the same. You and She will NOT be hooking up. She'd RATHER be single. Hurts?~

That's some typical fickle woman shit just like the dress issue. You can't tell a woman the truth and say she looks fat in the dress - you can't lie and tell her she looks good or she'll deny she looks good in the dress and change into another one. But if you don't say SHIT when she asks you what she looks like in a certain dress, then you're a low-down, dirty bastard that doesn't give her any attention.

~LOL! That is NOT the same thing. Apples and oranges. If she is wearing a wedding ring, then the answer is "Yes, she is married", whether she IS or NOT. Again, she's made the decision to be OFF LIMITS to you. There is no reason FOR you to ask her and then be given the run around by her. If you cross the line into her personal space and actually ASK her to audibly verify what you believe the ring means, then that's on you. You forced her to lie to you (if the ring is fake). Ever heard of "Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no lies."? Sure you have. It was none of your business if the ring was fake or not. It was none of your business if she wanted to appear married even though she wasn't. It was not your place to ask for verification of the visible clues. So, you did good. You've got morals and integrity appl. But why do you have to follow that up with a string of insults about her?~

Same deal with the ring. Fools think you're supposed to read their mind. If you acknowledge the ring and don't ask her out, then she gets mad. You ask her if she's married and she's wearing a fake ass ring she gets pissed. You ask her if she's single and the ring is REAL, then you're REALLY a low-down, dirty, womanizing, ho-hopping bastard. damned if you do, damned if you don't.[/QUOTE]

~SEE! That's EXACTLY what I was talking about! PLEEEEEASE tell me that you did NOT do all of that! Geesh! bang If she is wearing a ring only for the purpose of keeping men away, then let it be that. Haven't you ever made any personal decisions without outside interference whining about it? Who is to say that once she got to know you better that she wouldn't have CONFIDED in you that she was indeed available and had been checking you out? Giving her that space is much better than the alternative that causes tension and bad blood between you, imo. But, you do you. Good luck with that. Roll Eyes~
quote:
Originally posted by Suz: Ain't nothing happening, no dick is gold plated, no not one. Her silent message is screw yall & the beat up bomb you came driving in.


Here it is fellas. Black women have thrown in the towel... "screw us". I knew it was something behind Justin Timberlake and Robin Thicke getting mad love Razz

all jokes aside... let's get serious cool

quote:
What head games? If they can't get dates, if they sit home alone on the weekends don't you think they're entitled to have some fun & enjoy themselves sometime?


No they're not. They are however entitled to stick to their guns and stand by their fantasy about black love. The very same fantasy that they shove down black mens throats, but as we can see here, have very little concern about.

quote:
Or do you think they should sit around, head hung down low crying woe is me?


And please spare me the bs, you ladies aren't losing any sleep over WAITING for a black prince charming. You're losing just as much sleep as white women waiting for mr. white/right.

quote:
Some of you black men some kinda way have been put on a imaginary pedestal by some desparate dumbass black woman somewhere, & now you seem to think that if we don't suck up just right, begging for your attention that we're damned, & forever will be doomed to be alone.


Nope, but we did have "the goods" from black women on a pedastle, and now you're giving your goods to dem I-talians. nono. Black women have always been on a pedastle, because black men have an inherent appreciation for them on all levels, but this is the quickest way to be dethroned. (note the word appreciate) ...its neutral.

quote:
Those women went to Italy as part of a tour group with mutiple destinations & activities & there's nothing wrong with that. What is she suppose to do if she wants to go on vacation, pick up the tab for broke-back freeloading Tyrone who ain't got a pot to piss in or a window to through it out, living at home in his mama's house?


Why the side-steppin'? You know very well that has absolutely nothing to do with nothing. So... Why the side-steppin'?
quote:
quote: from: Suz
What head games? If they can't get dates, if they sit home alone on the weekends don't you think they're entitled to have some fun & enjoy themselves sometime?


From: HeruStar
No they're not. They are however entitled to stick to their guns and stand by their fantasy about black love. The very same fantasy that they shove down black mens throats, but as we can see here, have very little concern about.


Oh now I get it, you're a comedian right? Cause this has got to be a joke. Wait on a black man from now to eternity while he's chasing Black, White, Hispanic, Asian, Indian, etc. women & ain't serious about any of them? Hey babe what cha smokin' cause I want somma that? Now if you're sober then here comes the reality check: sista's have wasted enough of their precious time messing around with Black men who haven't a clue to what they want & the only thing they know how to do really well is find fault with Black women. If her goal is a committed relationship or marriage & you ain't serious, then it's time for her to cut her losses & move on. It's as simple as that.


P.S. - The remainder of your post made absolutely no sense to me whatsoever, therefore I couldn't address it.
suz wrote:
Those women went to Italy as part of a tour group with mutiple destinations & activities & there's nothing wrong with that. What is she suppose to do if she wants to go on vacation, pick up the tab for broke-back freeloading Tyrone who ain't got a pot to piss in or a window to through it out, living at home in his mama's house?

herustars reply:
Why the side-steppin'? You know very well that has absolutely nothing to do with nothing. So... Why the side-steppin'?

Truth moves, so if you're searching, I hope your moving too.[/quote]

kelley comment: herustar you da one tryna side step and confuse the subject.. the bottom line is the black woman wants to go on vacation and she does not want to go alone so she goes with a group of other women. another option is going with "broke ass tyrone" problem wit dat is you gotta pay his way. and why you wanna to take sand to da beach? wit all them willing
i-talian escorts to show you da sights and wine and dine you. sounds like hospitality to me. and variety is the spice of life. ( we learnt that from yall)
You ladies are killing me.

Tyrone = 50 states of Black men in America.

quote:
Originally posted by Suz:
If her goal is a committed relationship or marriage & you ain't serious, then it's time for her to cut her losses & move on. It's as simple as that.


You = (Tyrone/Black America)

You can't be this silly... no way.

quote:
P.S. - The remainder of your post made absolutely no sense to me whatsoever, therefore I couldn't address it


Well I'll make it make sense.

Women of all races share the same burden of wanting Mr. Right. Black women do not hold a monopoly on wanting a man of the same race in their life.

You gave two preposterous, illogical options.

1. Sit at home and cry, whilst "begging" for black men's attention

2. "Cut losses and move on" i.e. Get some I-Talian

If anyone is blazing anything here it's you sista. You've reduced an age old dilemma to nothing more than childish pouting, all the while touting independance.

Educated yourself to your options. Trying "something new" is definitely an option. But it's one of many.

--------------------------------------------

Kelly371,

Your sentiment contradicts an already hypocritical stance.

1. These women aren't going their for sex(Suz)

2. These women are going their for sex(kelley317) <--maybe slightly closer to the truth.

I can't keep up...
quote:
Originally posted by HeruStar:
You ladies are killing me.

Tyrone = 50 states of Black men in America.

quote:
Originally posted by Suz:
If her goal is a committed relationship or marriage & you ain't serious, then it's time for her to cut her losses & move on. It's as simple as that.


You = (Tyrone/Black America)

You can't be this silly... no way.

quote:
P.S. - The remainder of your post made absolutely no sense to me whatsoever, therefore I couldn't address it


Well I'll make it make sense.

Women of all races share the same burden of wanting Mr. Right. Black women do not hold a monopoly on wanting a man of the same race in their life.

You gave two preposterous, illogical options.

1. Sit at home and cry, whilst "begging" for black men's attention

2. "Cut losses and move on" i.e. Get some I-Talian

If anyone is blazing anything here it's you sista. You've reduced an age old dilemma to nothing more than childish pouting, all the while touting independance.

Educated yourself to your options. Trying "something new" is definitely an option. But it's one of many.

--------------------------------------------

Kelly371,

Your sentiment contradicts an already hypocritical stance.

1. These women aren't going their for sex(Suz)

2. These women are going their for sex(kelley317) <--maybe slightly closer to the truth.

I can't keep up...




It seems you have issues, with black women that have decided to move on, and date outside of their race.

Why? Are you not, for interracial dating?
quote:
Originally posted by kelley371:

******************************************************
sounds like a short list. i did note in one post romulus said he was datin a zimbabwahian woman who did hair on the side in addition to a professional job. seems like if he was so diserable she would snatch him right up and not have to work around the clock. she must have not trusted the "stability" part of what he has to offer. but perhaps i am mistaking what he means.
he didn't say financial security.
honestbrother if you are a young man sounds like you do have yo head on straight. keep on keepin on.


HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!! Why do y'all women always insist on grabbing hold of what you think is the first indication of an injustice or a flaw?

First of all she was just a girlfriend in a short-lived, monogamous relationship - nothing more even though she did want to eventually marry me. Secondly, I told her she didn't have to keep doing hair on the side. It was her decision to keep doing hair every night until 11pm. She wanted to have her cake and eat it too - she wanted to be in a serious relationship with me but she didn't want to let go of making her own extra cash. But I'm to be the blame for that right? Because I didn't convince her enough to drop her side gig? HA HA HA HA HA!!!

Thirdly, I don't give a damn how desirable I am, ain't no woman going to "snatch me up" if I don't want her to snatch me up. I'm not going to assume you're a gold digger since out of that short list of qualities I have the mere fact that you wanted to know about my "financial security" is of importance to you. Even though I am financially secure the woman I marry will have to carry her own weight, which simply means I'm not marrying no housewife.

Sure I don't mind my future wife taking off a few months maybe even a year or two to take care of our newborn child but I'm not going to be burdened with being the sole provider of an entire family. But I shouldn't have to worry about that anyway since I know my future wife will already be a career-minded woman.
quote:
Kelly371,

Your sentiment contradicts an already hypocritical stance.

1. These women aren't going their for sex(Suz)

2. These women are going their for sex(kelley317) <--maybe slightly closer to the truth.

I can't keep up...


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it figures you can't keep up. i was presumptious thinking you may be intelligent. but when you call a woman a mofo then i guess we have to get down to your level of understanding. ok we can do dat. (btw i've always posted in ebonics and slang so my posts could be understood on the 8th grade level cause i know it's a lot of you guys out there.)

and when you quote somebody why don't you get it right
instead you post your simple understanding of what you think i meant. and forgive me for assuming again but i spose you thought i ment taking sand to da beach means going to italy for sex. shows you got your mind on the sexual activities that may be happenin in italy. (could there be a lil inadequacy questions in yourself?) anyway taking sand to the beach could mean taking a man on a vacation where there is already plenty of male attention, especially another flavor.
if you go to italy why not try the italian food and everything else italian if you want to.
quote:
~Awww! Po'thang! I guess that WOULD hurt a bit to know that even though she's alone at night stuffing her noxema creamed face with bonbons, SHE STILL would rather use the "ring trick" to keep YOU AWAY. Ouch!~


What? I don't get your point. Where am I supposed to be hurt that a black woman is sitting at home alone because she'd rather fend me off with a fake ring when, meanwhile, I'm having the time of my life with my non-black woman of choice? By the way, my woman and I had apple Mojitos at a tiki bar on Las Olas in Fort Lauderdale last Friday. Damn - that was the BEST Mojito I ever had in my LIFE!!

quote:
~Nor should you. That's good manners. Now, take your morals and integrity one step further and allow her her personal space. If she'd rather be seen as married when she isn't, then she has her personal reasons. Respect them. What's it to you? Bottom line is SHE IS UNAVAILABLE by CHOICE. HER CHOICE. She's allowed to do that. She's off limits, be it for real reasons or fake ones, and it doesn't really matter WHICH in the end does it? The end result is still the same. You and She will NOT be hooking up. She'd RATHER be single. Hurts?~


You're running around in circles trying to twist this situation to the advantage of the sisterhood of angry black women. You need to go back and read that passage you so clandestinely want to quote me from. I respected her ring from the get-go and didn't even inquire about her availability. I didn't know the ring was FAKE until AFTER I had talked to my other co-worker who told me she was actually single. It was the fact that I asked her to ask ANOTHER woman if she was single is what hurt her feelings, so if anyone was "HURT" it was her.

quote:
~LOL! That is NOT the same thing. Apples and oranges. If she is wearing a wedding ring, then the answer is "Yes, she is married", whether she IS or NOT. Again, she's made the decision to be OFF LIMITS to you.


You're speaking for this woman and you don't even know who she is. And how can you twist this situation around to make it sound like she wanted me to KNOW she was off limits to me. I'm confused. I'm new to this company and never knew this woman before working for this company. How is it that she all of a sudden put the fake ring on to fend ME off? So now you're giving her powers of ESP and clairvoyancy to know that I would be a single brother that may ask her out? The hell? Where do y'all get these hair-brained ideas?

quote:
~SEE! That's EXACTLY what I was talking about! PLEEEEEASE tell me that you did NOT do all of that! Geesh! If she is wearing a ring only for the purpose of keeping men away, then let it be that. Haven't you ever made any personal decisions without outside interference whining about it? Who is to say that once she got to know you better that she wouldn't have CONFIDED in you that she was indeed available and had been checking you out? Giving her that space is much better than the alternative that causes tension and bad blood between you, imo. But, you do you. Good luck with that. ~


Let me put it to you this way: Any man or woman that wears a fake wedding ring is a fool primarily because if you live long enough in a certain area people are going to spread the news that the ring is fake anyway, so what's the point? Secondly, wearing a ring only attracts the REAL dogs, pimps, and players - since when do you know of a ring stopping a dude from stepping up to her? You just don't want to admit some of these cockamamey ideas you women come up with not only backfire but bring about adverse effects.
quote:
Orginally posted by Qty:
It seems you have issues, with black women that have decided to move on, and date outside of their race.

Why? Are you not, for interracial dating?


Honestly, this is a non-issue for me. I'm just basically annoyed by the self-serving hypocracy by some of these ladies here.

I mean, to sugarcoat squandering themselves tells me alot about their integrity. Black women going to Italy, to me... well, it is what it is. To some of these ladies however, it's "Tyrone's broke (Black America), I can't find a man, I'm lonely on the edge of depression, and black men aint..."

Just in responding to me we have...

1. It's not about love... it's about having fun
2. Why should these women sit at home crying...
hmmm...

Why would they cry... if it weren't about love?

1. Black men are broke, they can't afford to go to Italy.

(Someone needs to check the statistics)

2. Why take sand to the beach.

So many circles...
Typical

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