Skip to main content

I met this guy online about 2 1/2 weeks ago. I was really shocked to meet someone from my city around my age who was nice looking, has a job, etc. (Nowadays, thats a rare item online, LOL) Anyway, we chatted online for hours and finally exchanged phone numbers. By the time we were done chatting, it was late night, so I decided I would call him the next day. I was so excited about the potential of this brotha! He was a great conversationalist, bright, witty....

So I called him. We hit it off and talked frequently. Let me just mention that this brotha is from up north and I was born and raised here in NC. The weekend came and we decided to see one another. We hooked up, went to the park, etc. We had a very nice Sunday afternoon.

Now, here is where stuff starts to get a little irritating. That evening, he got a phone call from a friend from up north. This dude stands in my living room and discusses another female (briefly) and in his loud voice says "yeah, with all that ass.........." Ok??? Strike ONE-Disrespect.

All that week, he called me and kept asking to come to my house. Now, I work full time and am a single mother. By the time I get home and complete my daily routine, its kinda late. AND at that point, I didn't feel like I knew him well enough to even consider letting him come over for a night visit. I told the dude several times that I wasn't ready for all that. He gets mad at me and says "Nobody wants a weekend warrior. Women always say they want a good man and when one comes by they can't see him." Ok???? Strike TWO-Not respecting my duties as a mother AND stereotyping ME.

So, last Saturday night, I went to a party at a local sports bar. I was determined to have a ball. Loved the crowd, the atmosphere. He asked me what I was doing and I told him. The dude came to the bar, sat at the table the whole night, would not dance, kept watching me like I was a newborn baby. (Reminded me of that comedian on Comic View some years back imitating the dude in the club "DATS MY GIRL!")At one point, I went to the ladies room. I guess I stayed too long b/c the brotha TEXTED me and asked me where I was! Dude got upset when I told him he was NOT invited to come home with me and left the bar.

Ok, now, am I missing something? Is there a geographical difference in the way women are expected to behave? Why do I feel like he is trying to move at the speed of light? I mean, dayum, what happened to the FIRST DATE? Does "getting to know you" really mean "coming to your crib twelve times a week and accidentally falling asleep and hopefully falling into that warm spot b/w your legs", nowadays? WTF?
Shema
Original Post

Replies sorted oldest to newest

quote:
Originally posted by RadioRaheem:
the guy seem to be possessive. Good move telling him to get lost...bad move in inviting him to your residence...now this nut knows where you live. You should really be a little more protective about meeting new people [on or offline] and inviting them to the home you share with your child. Please be careful.



yeah
quote:
Originally posted by The one and only ME:
Raheem:

You are soooo right! I have been thinking about that ever since I opened the door for him that day! Frown

I don't know why I slipped that time. bangI normally don't let anyone come to my house initially whether I met him online or out and about.

Nevertheless, I am well protected. And I know he is not trying to meet my Lady friend...... karate



Don't beat yourself up ... but bro-man was definitely disrespectful and trying to move way too fast. Radio hit it on the head: "Possessive"
quote:
Originally posted by xxGAMBITxx:
After "strike one" he should of been bounced....

Another case of enabling bad behavior...




Yeah i agree with this...

I understand that men talk about women, with their boyz.....and im ok with that. But if a man, that im interested in.....talks about another womans "ass" in front of me.........its over.

To me, this is an indication of whats to come....
quote:
Originally posted by qty226:
quote:
Originally posted by xxGAMBITxx:
After "strike one" he should of been bounced....

Another case of enabling bad behavior...




Yeah i agree with this...

I understand that men talk about women, with their boyz.....and im ok with that. But if a man, that im interested in.....talks about another womans "ass" in front of me.........its over.

To me, this is an indication of whats to come....


You got that right. Standing there in her home, talking about this is indicative of more than lack of respect..

Thats lack of intelligence....
quote:
Originally posted by The one and only ME:
See, now, I get mixed signals from people when it comes to letting things slide...... When I cut people off at the knees after violating once, I am told that I reacted too quickly, I should have given another chance....... sck


Those people that told you that are idiots and never take advice from idiots.
quote:
Originally posted by The one and only ME:
Raheem:

You are soooo right! I have been thinking about that ever since I opened the door for him that day! Frown

I don't know why I slipped that time. bangI normally don't let anyone come to my house initially whether I met him online or out and about.

Nevertheless, I am well protected. And I know he is not trying to meet my Lady friend...... karate



I think online dating is like regular dating. Two women from my job met their husband their...one even on that crappy blackplanet dating thingy. I think you should focus on meeting men at starbucks or borders bookstores for coffee or tea first. slow things down. look out for the psychos and choose wisely. I hope you all the best!!!


RR
quote:
Originally posted by The one and only ME:
See, now, I get mixed signals from people when it comes to letting things slide...... When I cut people off at the knees after violating once, I am told that I reacted too quickly, I should have given another chance....... sck


I think you have to pick and choose when to cut a man off. No one is perfect........but if hes disrespectful, then thats just something i cant tolerate.


All dating sites are crappy........the key is, not every person on those sites are. So you really have to pick and choose.....and remember that if it doesnt work out, dont take it personally. Smile

Add Reply

Post
×
×
×
×
Link copied to your clipboard.
×