Fellas, what have you sacrificed for a lady?

My sanity.

squares

The friendship of a dear and close friend.

I regretted it at the time and continue to regret it years after the lady was no longer in my life because the friendship never recovered.

And Oh Yeah ...

Welcome back Gambit. It's good to see you back and apparently in good health.

I gave up a good job and relocated... putting myself in a bad finacial position while simultaneously setting my career back about five years. And I'm still recovering from the damage done by those two decisions.

Yeah, I know... stuck-on-stupid.


BTW - Sup Gambit! Good to see you again.

Not a damn thing.

Romulus ... The question was what HAVE you sacrificed; not what would you sacrifice now.

As you've answered, I have to call ... There is no way that you could be as damaged as you are without your first having sacrificed something ... I suspect a lot.

quote:

Originally posted by Kweli4Real:
Romulus ... The question was what HAVE you sacrificed; not what would you sacrifice now.

As you've answered, I have to call ... There is no way that you could be as damaged as you are without your first having sacrificed something ... I suspect a lot.

It's already been established a long time ago you don't have the basic cognitive capability to comprehend simple statements or answer simple questions, and you try to derail, distract, and redirect out of ignorance and immaturity, so why should this situation be any different?

Let me make it a little more clear for you, speedy. Other than time and money I never have, am currently not, and never will sacrifice a damn thing for a female. After having met the parents of my then soon to be fiancee I was faced with the choice of retaining my christianity or converting to another faith as well as our future children not having their choice of religion if I had married her. I chose christianity.

I was faced with the choice of advancing early in my career before finishing my masters degree, which would take me out of state or stay in grad school and marry a female I had recently settled differences with. After further observation I determined from her academic struggles as well as her willingness to listen to the advice of disgruntled single college girls over an established, experienced man such as myself that I should follow the career opportunity.

I had to make the choice between maintaining a serious relationship with a female I met in Florida or going back home to finish my masters degree. Her continued battles from divorcing her husband and struggling with her then teenage son I made the choice to return home to finish my masters degree. Next year I'll be enrolled in a doctorate program in organizational leadership. Can you see the pattern of choosing career advancement and education over a questionable situation with a potential significant other? I doubt you can. I've already had first hand experience of the down side of making sacrifices for a significant other that isn't on the same page and that is a path I choose not to follow.

I don't believe I've ever made any significant sacrifices for any woman, or for any relationship. I'm not saying that's a good or bad thing; I just have never done it.

quote:

Originally posted by Vox:
I don't believe I've ever made any significant sacrifices for any woman, or for any relationship. I'm not saying that's a good or bad thing; I just have never done it.

That's not what you originally said.

quote:

Originally posted by xxGAMBITxx:
My sanity.

I'm reminded of my favorite scene in the movie 'As Good As It Gets' starring Jack Nicholson:

Secretary: "I've read all of your books. What do you do to prepare yourself to think like a woman when you write?

Nicholson: "I picture myself as a man and take away reason and accountability."



As Good as It Gets (1997)

quote:

Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:

quote:

Originally posted by Vox:
I don't believe I've ever made any significant sacrifices for any woman, or for any relationship. I'm not saying that's a good or bad thing; I just have never done it.

That's not what you originally said.

No, that is exactly what I originally said. In addition to that, I made an additonal comment about you which I deleted. But that comment (disagreeing with Kweli and opining that your profound personality problems must have originated in childhood, rather than from a relationship) was made in ADDITION to, not INSTEAD of, the comment I made about never having sacrificed.

quote:

Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:

quote:

Originally posted by Kweli4Real:
Romulus ... The question was what HAVE you sacrificed; not what would you sacrifice now.

As you've answered, I have to call ... There is no way that you could be as damaged as you are without your first having sacrificed something ... I suspect a lot.

It's already been established a long time ago you don't have the basic cognitive capability to comprehend simple statements or answer simple questions, and you try to derail, distract, and redirect out of ignorance and immaturity, so why should this situation be any different?

You've aleady distracted from the thread ... and by means of all the aforementioned character deficiencies.

quote:

Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
Let me make it a little more clear for you, speedy. Other than time and money I never have, am currently not, and never will sacrifice a damn thing for a female.

Then you could have have spared yourself ... and us ... the drama by simply not posting on the thread.

It's about what men have sacrificed.

If you haven't sacrificed a thing, then it seems you have nothing to contribute to the discussion.

quote:

Originally posted by HonestBrother:
If you haven't sacrificed a thing, then it seems you have nothing to contribute to the discussion.

This is Romulus you're talking about though... it's not as if he could pass on an opportunity to "try to derail, distract, and redirect out of ignorance and immaturity".

Fuck all this nonsense. None of you are smart enough to con a 5-year-old let alone think you can spin this into implicating me as derailing this thread. I simply made an answer "Not a damn thing" and left it at that. Are there any other entries in this thread from me that seek to "derail" this thread before kweli came up in here with his usual bullshit? Hell no. To ignore kweli's intentional derailing just to start some shit and come whinning up in my face is just another example of the kind of gang mentality foolishness that goes down on this site as was discussed in another infamous thread that was purposefully derailed so it could be closed.

Now, back to the topic at hand: There are two sides to every coin - If you can't deal with the fact that I have the drive, ambition, resiliancy and perserverance not to take a detour from my goals and ambitions for a woman, then some of you have a lot of growing up to do. Some of you have to understand how to prioritize your lives according to self preservation rather than giving in to what society dictates to you how you should conduct your lives. Women come and go but an education, credentials is forever. If you've sacrificed something of significance for a woman, then that's the choice you made. But there's nothing valiant or honorable about stifling your full potential for something that isn't guaranteed.

quote:

Originally posted by Wiz:
squares

You sacrificed squares? What does that mean?

Postponed my college education - twice.. for two different women.

Helped them both get BA's and in the case of ONE, actually did a lot of the online coursework that led to her getting her MBA.

I'm sitting on an AS, when technically I should have two BA's and an MBA. Totally unacceptable.

quote:

Originally posted by Vox:

quote:

Originally posted by Wiz:
squares

You sacrificed squares? What does that mean?

Cigarettes. I think.

quote:

Originally posted by Vox:

quote:

Originally posted by Wiz:
squares

You sacrificed squares? What does that mean?

When I got married, my wife asked me to stop smoking, so I did. I miss squares

I hope you all don't mind my posting this...but I've been reading along and laughing...

Interesting reading...and very telling.

"Wisdom Is Always A Woman Interested In The Thoughts Of Others!"

I wrote a poem a long time ago that kinda describes what I sacrificed... vaguely however.

I tried to take you deep inside
And provided you with the capacity to hurt
To provoke

My hairs to turn gray
Within a day
Within an hour, a second of your prescence

They say the best things in our life are free
Apparently then,
They don't think love is one of the best things
I'm beginning to agree

For instance,
Your love cost me my pride and dignity
It replaced my mild manners with malignity
Oh but I have plenty chivalry
Meanwhile my patience is spent
And I think you think
What I feel is irrelevant.



Signed.
Your Love?

All of my attractive female friends...

quote:

Originally posted by Romulus Burnett:
Let me make it a little more clear for you, speedy. Other than time and money I never have, am currently not, and never will sacrifice a damn thing for a female. After having met the parents of my then soon to be fiancee I was faced with the choice of retaining my christianity or converting to another faith as well as our future children not having their choice of religion if I had married her. I chose christianity.

quote:

Originally posted by Vox:
No, that is exactly what I originally said. In addition to that, I made an additonal comment about you which I deleted. But that comment (disagreeing with Kweli and opining that your profound personality problems must have originated in childhood, rather than from a relationship) was made in ADDITION to, not INSTEAD of, the comment I made about never having sacrificed.

My life, my heart and my dreams. In return I was given a better life, A heart filled with love and dreams fulfilled. She has passed on now but Oh what she gave me was more than I hoped for.

quote:

Originally posted by Fagunwa:
My life, my heart and my dreams. In return I was given a better life, A heart filled with love and dreams fulfilled. She has passed on now but Oh what she gave me was more than I hoped for.

I'm sorry to hear about your wife, Fagunwa.

But, welcome back.

quote:

Originally posted by Fagunwa:
My life, my heart and my dreams. In return I was given a better life, A heart filled with love and dreams fulfilled. She has passed on now but Oh what she gave me was more than I hoped for.

Fagunwa, I'm sorry to hear about your loss.

The things you shared in the past about your marriage were a real inspiration to me.

quote:

Originally posted by HonestBrother:

quote:

Originally posted by Fagunwa:
My life, my heart and my dreams. In return I was given a better life, A heart filled with love and dreams fulfilled. She has passed on now but Oh what she gave me was more than I hoped for.

Fagunwa, I'm sorry to hear about your loss.

The things you shared in the past about your marriage were a real inspiration to me.

and once again, I'm so sorry for your loss.

It's nice to see you are still around Baba Fagunwa. Se Alafia ni o?

Alafia ni dada Sis. Thank you all for your condolences.

quote:

Originally posted by Fagunwa:
My life, my heart and my dreams. In return I was given a better life, A heart filled with love and dreams fulfilled. She has passed on now but Oh what she gave me was more than I hoped for.

Brother Fagunwa, it's so easy for us to sink into deep depression and isolate ourselves from others during times of grief. But I'm glad to see that you have decided to have a joyful and positive attitude about your soul mate's passing! May your positive attitude keep your heart warm and receptive to receiving love from old and new friendships! Be well brother. And welcome back. We've missed you around here!

quote:

Originally posted by Rowe:

quote:

Originally posted by Fagunwa:
My life, my heart and my dreams. In return I was given a better life, A heart filled with love and dreams fulfilled. She has passed on now but Oh what she gave me was more than I hoped for.

Brother Fagunwa, it's so easy for us to sink into deep depression and isolate ourselves from others during times of grief. But I'm glad to see that you have decided to have a joyful and positive attitude about your soul mate's passing! May your positive attitude keep your heart warm and receptive to receiving love from old and new friendships! Be well brother. And welcome back. We've missed you around here!

Thank you Sis Rowe, but it took me one year to come out of my house. It has been a long hard road, but our ancestors have kept me in their hands.

Fagunwa, I'm so sorry to hear about your wife. I remember she actually posted here once, and the brief glimpses you gave us of your relationship revealed a joy and a respect that were really uplifting. And here, I appreciate your sharing for a different reason. Your sacrifice brought you joy and betterment. I am pretty sure I have never sacrificed anything, and I'm not sure how much joy or betterment I've experienced by comparison. Even in the face of the most humbling, grief-inspiring situation, the wise, regal example you set has provided a potentially valuable life lesson. Stay strong, and thank you for coming back.

quote:

Originally posted by Vox:
Fagunwa, I'm so sorry to hear about your wife. I remember she actually posted here once, and the brief glimpses you gave us of your relationship revealed a joy and a respect that were really uplifting. And here, I appreciate your sharing for a different reason. Your sacrifice brought you joy and betterment. I am pretty sure I have never sacrificed anything, and I'm not sure how much joy or betterment I've experienced by comparison. Even in the face of the most humbling, grief-inspiring situation, the wise, regal example you set has provided a potentially valuable life lesson. Stay strong, and thank you for coming back.

Thank you Vox. The sharing of self is the ultimate gift and in that sacrifice the receipt is immeasurable. There is nothing that compares to true Black love. We are a unique and beautiful people and our relationships can be very rewarding if we allow them to be. That's what those Tyler Perry movies are all about. Out of pain comes triumph. This is the lesson our ancestors have demonstrated for us.

Glad to see you back Fagunwa...

Very sorry to hear about your loss...


Salaam....

quote:

Originally posted by Fagunwa:
My life, my heart and my dreams. In return I was given a better life, A heart filled with love and dreams fulfilled. She has passed on now but Oh what she gave me was more than I hoped for.

Brother Fagunwa, I can only imagine what you are feeling right now... I don't even know what to say... Other than I will keep you in my prayers... and welcome back...

Thank you so much for the words of welcome. I am getting better every day. Many have not had the chance to receive what I was blessed with. I have received much from the Divinities and our ancestors. I am very grateful.