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This is why I have a problem with you"”you, as well as MBM, whom I will address later, ignored the entire first half of my discussions entitled, "There IS no black male shortage" and "Subduing intimidating sisters" and immediately jumped to making snap judgments of my character to the effect of being full of shit, sexist, arrogant, and not being able to listen and learn.

You accuse me of the very thing you didn't do yourself, which is to listen and learn or, in this case, just read"”which is why I made this disclaimer at the very beginning of my discussion:

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"”oh, and by the way, before I begin my first lesson, for those of you brothers that already know what the dealie is, keep your condescending comments to yourselves"”this is for the brothers that don't know.


Either you overlooked that disclaimer or you chose to ignore it because you felt it was more important to make snap judgments of me. It took Rowe's perspective to get you to open your eyes and realize that you were, indeed, wrong in this assumption:

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Rowe
I thought he was stating the obvious when he made those comments. But apparently not according to your experiences. I assumed the best in my brothas. I assumed that like me that have a wide variety of fragrances. Hygiene, man I can't believe brothas still haven't caught on to smelling fresh. To me, the best impression is Clean (zestfully clean).


You can't assume just because you may have yourself together, which is in question since there is no evidence to prove otherwise, that other brothers are doing the same, which Rowe made rather vividly apparent:

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....in my area at least, I'm noticing that many men, particularly the youngsters, are neglecting their appearance. Sloppiness seems to almost be "The" new look. I'm in my late twenties and will be interested in marrying soon. However, men my age, are looking alot less attractive and sloppy nowadays. They don't invest in quality clothing, they don't maintain a hair cut, and they eat poorly, which causes them to be overweight. Its a disappointment that I'm having trouble accepting. Therefore, I say keep posting and spreading your message to the brothers. It's definitely needed!


Just like you ˜assumed the best in your brothas,' I assumed the best in you to the effect that I didn't feel the need to explain, word for word, what you already know, however, Rowe's perspective eliminated the need to do so"”in fact, her expressions pretty much made all of that trash you sputtered rather irrelevant, particularly since you decided to backtrack to expound on what I consider to be trivial nonsense and an you decided to comment on:

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I applaud the effort, but man you got to go back to the drawing board if you want an eternal ROMANCE.

Yeah flippin' right! There is no elementary appeal to authority in this forum. Your con games and self-implied-imposed expertise will not fly either.

Your "tactics" are tacky. You combat intimidation (which is uncalled for) with intimidation. In other words, let's make them feel uncomfortable and vulnerable first.You show your ignorance when you make generalizations about women because of their geographic locations.

I think your posts are riddled with B.S. like

If I'm telling brothers in the very beginning of my discussion to LISTEN AND LEARN then, OBVIOUSLY, I would, be as you put it, "studying what SHE is communicating to you."

I'm glad you capitalized OBVIOUSLY, because it really magnifies how full of crap you are. This vague Listen and Learn statement can in no way be applied to what I said. Your Listen and learn was attached to the whole "get some female friends" spill you went on. As if we should take notes from our female counterparts. Study what she is communicating means WATCH (wait I think I have to say this again WATCH) which is totally different from LISTENING.


Was there really such a need for all of this trash? 3 pages of snide, vindictive, spiteful, callous comments"”all render moot by Rowe's comments.

After all was said and done, firstly, how is it that you think you can give me advice on how to be romantic when you have attested to being 'hardly romantic' yourself? Secondly, you're right--opinions can't be bested nor can they be wrong, so how can you attack my opinions yet you say it's wrong for me to question yours? Wow, man--so much overwhelming evidence, it's just preposterous.
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"”oh, and by the way, before I begin my first lesson, for those of you brothers that already know what the dealie is, keep your condescending comments to yourselves"”this is for the brothers that don't know.


Who are you? How did you convince yourself that you have that much authority?

firstly, how is it that you think you can give me advice on how to be romantic when you have attested to being 'hardly romantic' yourself Iron

Takes one to know one.


Secondly, you're right--opinions can't be bested nor can they be wrong, so how can you attack my opinions yet you say it's wrong for me to question yours Iron

This is where your confused. The format here is informal, yet we still have room to agree or disagree. I can disagree with some of your opinions without appearing to "best" you.
You're a fool, HeruStar, and the rest of your passive aggressive, boorish buddies are begining to see that responding to my discussions only with quotes, indirect comments, riddles, open-ended questions, snide remarks and childish cartoons clearly aren't matching up.

So far, you haven't posted anything credible since I've made those two forums, nothing creative and original of your own--just shit loads of opinions and quotations of what I said. Of all of your effort to try to debunk my credibility, you got shot down by one of your own regulars, and still you backtracked, trying to save face.

What's really funny is, I haven't even gone full throttle on you clowns yet--I'm enjoying being diplomatic too much--it's refreshing to make fun of someone's inferiority without using curse words to do it. There's a change on the horizon, HeruStar--you people in here are too uptight, anal retentive, easily threatened, bourgeoise, conceited, frigid, contemptible and irrefutably lacking in a palettable sense of humor.

Some things are going to change around here, HeruStar. Too many of you function like one little clique of girl scouts--everyone is afraid to comment on anything too far from what others would percieve as being acceptable for fear of being Ostracized. And this business of butchering up people's comments and statements to prove a point--that shit ain't creative nor is it entertaining, which is supposed to be the reason why people come here--to be enlightened and entertained. So far, I haven't seen that.

The atmosphere is too much like a gin rummy, bingo or a bridge game at an old folks home--nobody has any true wit, just cheesy inside jokes. Some things are going to have to change around here, HeruStar if you want to continue following my genius.
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So far, you haven't posted anything credible since I've made those two forums, nothing creative and original of your own--just shit loads of opinions and quotations of what I said. Of all of your effort to try to debunk my credibility, you got shot down by one of your own regulars, and still you backtracked, trying to save face


<--doesn't need to save face

You cry too much. Hiding behind Rowe won't save you. You're going to have to "come up out from under dem females" soon. You seek way too many compliments and attention, I guess that's how you function. Real confidence comes from within; not from this buttery stuff you're trying to get from the ladies.


Do you really think the stuff you say is "creative" or "inventive"? Your alliteration is lacking substance, but I guess in your "creative" mind, style trumps substance any day.
Isn't there a private message feature for this type of one on one communication? With all due respect, Iron, Heru's opinions are just as viable as yours are - whether you agree or not. All voices have value.

If you think you could do a better job than MBM, why don't you start your own spot where you could set the agenda and be in total control. Perhaps total control is what you need to be happy. I ain't mad at cha, but you have the ability to settle your private beefs privately.

I read far more than I post because ever learning is my quest in life. It hurts me to see brothers calling other brothers out of their names and putting each other down. I love my brothers regardless of what their personal views are. heart

I bid you peace, Iron.
I respect you, Sandye, as well as your statements and opinions, however, there's an inconsistency in this dilemna.

There were two parties involved in this clashing of differences: myself and HeruStar.

How is it that I'm personally attacked for expressing my opinions, which, I still don't see the reason why it was necessary, yet, if I defend my statements by responding the same way as Herustar did, then I'm wrong? How is it that I'm made out to be the villian and HeruStar is the victim? How is it that two people were involved in this literary scurmish but only I am the one that's being accused? That sounds biased to me.

Was it really necessary for HeruStar to argue back and forth about who's tactics were right or wrong, only to be proven wrong by the very demographic I was targeting--a single, young, concerned sister--Rowe, only to backtrack and make his own pitiful rendition, copying my style, of what I already discussed:

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Banana Republic and Nordstroms pretty much keep you constantly up to date on what's in season. Women stay in season, so brothas should too. I think class trumps flash and bling anyday. Oh yeah, JC Penny is a good place too, but they force you to use your imagination and be creative. Stay away from the Gap and Old Navy! (I know the women disagree) But I'm speaking on men's clothing.


Was that little cheap fashion tip worth HeruStar mentioning especially after the fact of ignoring my same gesture? Perhaps it would have been more friendly of a gesture to have offered his own perspective on these issues, instead of trying to tear my opinions and suggestions down while talking his opinions and suggestions up. That, by anyone's opinion, is tacky and shrewd--there is nothing INTELLIGENT or COMMUNITY, about that.

By the way, who the hell shops at JC penny? You're also a fool if you waste money shopping at Nordstrom's and Banana Republic (I thought Banana Republic was the designated gay clothing store for brothers in the closet?) There are plenty discount clothing stores and outlets that carry the same name brand clothes at nearly half or, in some cases, a fourth of what they cost in the mall.

It was also apparent that HeruStar's opinions were, indeed, wrong which was made evident by yet another person's clarifying comments, which, by the way, was made by someone that 'everybody loves,' Fagunwa. No, I'm not hiding behind anyone, just stating the facts.

No, I don't need my own spot, and I don't need control of anything--I just came here to share ideas, express opinions, enlighten and entertain, however, I will stand firm in what I believe in, especially when I know what I believe in is tested and true.

To tell you the truth, after HeruStar posted that pic up of himself (Yeah I saw your pic, dude, and that was quite silly to say the least)to somehow prove something to me, I just laughed--I refused to respond to such childishness any further--once again, showing jealousy and enviousness--two steps behind--I logged off and moved on.

I also bid you peace, Sandye, and many future positive and constructive interaction.
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By the way, who the hell shops at JC penny? You're also a fool if you waste money shopping at Nordstrom's and Banana Republic (I thought Banana Republic was the designated gay clothing store for brothers in the closet?) There are plenty discount clothing stores and outlets that carry the same name brand clothes at nearly half or, in some cases, a fourth of what they cost in the mall



Well for goodness sakes. Pardon me for going shopping with a woman, and taking her advice on what's sexy and gravitating. Fellas should dress to impress. Fellas should dress to impress. Fellas should dress to impress A WOMAN. Not their homies. You probably fall victim of that. Scared to take risks, and stray away from blending in with the average dude. I don't bling, but I don't blend either. I walk the way I do, FOR A WOMAN. I cut my hair, FOR A WOMAN. I shave, FOR A WOMAN. Whatevery THEY like, you best believe Ima do. A man that says otherwise is the one hiding in the closet. THEY turn heads all the time. I DO TO. Mix my Alpha Mentality with some nice fittin's, and skurp (they hittin' the breaks). I don't know when the last time I had to build the nerve to approach a woman. Shux, lately I've been trippin' off of womens pick up lines... ({stops dead in her trax} oh my god...{talking to her friend} he is so beautiful) (my numbers in your pocket)and the latest (So... when are you going to call me?)

So if where I shop is that hillarious, then I don't know who the joke is on, because it sure isnt' on me. Besides, I haven't dressed like my peers since Junior High.
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Mix my Alpha Mentality with some nice fittin's, and skurp (they hittin' the breaks). I don't know when the last time I had to build the nerve to approach a woman. Shux, lately I've been trippin' off of womens pick up lines... ({stops dead in her trax} oh my god...{talking to her friend} he is so beautiful) (my numbers in your pocket)and the latest (So... when are you going to call me?)


BAAAAAAAAA HA HA HA HA HA HAHA HA HA HA HA!!!!

*Wiping tears from my eyes and reading this quote again*

BWAAA HA HA HA HA HA!!!

HeruStar, how old are you, man? 18? 20? I'm going to do you, and your ego a favor and not even comment on that garbage you just wasted 5 minutes to type up.

By the way, man, why don't you post that pic up of yourself again, wearing that white wife beater and white jeans (Who in the hell wears white jeans?). I'm not tearing you down, I'm just going to give you my honest opinion:

Man, you looked like a gay, low-ranking, boiler room sailor from the 50's. If wearing a white wife beater, sloppily tucked in a pair of white jeans is your idea of a fashion statement, no wonder you would think shopping at JC penny is the "in" thing to do. Personally, I make it a point not to shop for clothing at a store that sells refrigerators, garden tools, and lawn mowers on the same floor with their clothing. When I said "take a woman with you when you go shopping," in my original discussion, I didn't mean take your mama, I meant to take a woman close to your age that has good taste in what she thinks a man her age would look good in.

and, ummm, HeruStar, what's with the high top, s-curl fade? I thought that went out with Al B. Sure? We don't use S-curl in this day and age, man.

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Fellas should dress to impress. Fellas should dress to impress. Fellas should dress to impress A WOMAN. Not their homies.


HeruStar, what was the reason for repeating that first line twice? Was that a Freudian slip? You trying to tell us something, man? The more you try to defend yourself for being too eager to tear me down instead of just offering your opinion, the more ignorant you make yourself look.

I already stated that a man should bring a woman with him when he goes shopping a long time ago, so once again, you make yourself look silly, restating what I've already said--let me emphasize the fact, since it slipped your comprehension the first time around, that if you want to impress a woman, more specifically, the type of woman you would be attracted to, you take a woman with you that possesses the type of taste you would be interested in with you when you go shopping.

If you do possess an alpha mentality, you possess it in a primate sense of the term--you certainly don't possess it in a mature, wise, cultured, natural leader sense, and you most DEFINATELY don't possess the qualities of a real Alpha man. You possess more of the recessive qualities of a follower, which is clear by the way you keep following my quotes instead of having the creativity to take this conversation in another direction.

All you had to do, HeruStar, was swallow some of that superfluous ego and pride you're spilling all over this website and look to me for guidance or at least compare notes instead of trying to compete because from a grown, accomplished, successful man's point of view, you're falling short.
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Nice try

I'm glad you stopped whinin' though
Maybe it's the self-esteem boost you got from Rowe
Question, have you admitted you a fag yet?
How you gone come to the Den and show your assets
Whole time wasting your time tryna wax me
Only thing you've revealed, is you forgot to change your Maxi


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...mature, wise, cultured, natural leader sense, and you most DEFINATELY don't possess the qualities of a real Alpha man. All you had to do, HeruStar, was swallow some of that superfluous ego and pride you're spilling all over this website and look to me for guidance or at least compare notes instead of trying to compete because from a grown, accomplished, successful man's point of view, you're falling short.


Blaspheme will get you nowhere. It's funny, the more you talk, the more inferior you sound. Look to you? Look at you. You're nothing but a poser, a fakester. The culture that you picked out of a brochure and posed in doesn't impress me. Everything about you screams fake. I could care less about your emphasis. To me, you're a confederate conservative negro, ashamed of your real culture. I guess because you adhere to a more european style, you think you're refined now. NIGGA PLEASE. You're a wack job.
Iron, I would never attack you for any of your opinions, beliefs, or statements. My post was merely offering an alternative manner of settling your differences on a one-on-one basis. I don't endorse personal attacks because they create animosity which undermines edification. I haven't read all of the posts to which you refer, but I just hate to see my brothers all wrapped up in negativity. I love my brothers ... each and every one of you.

Have a productive and positive day, Iron and Heru. Smile
That's your problem right there. You can't come prancing into an African Village in your european princely robe, on your High Horse, with a letter from the white man saying things are going to change. I rebel. And I will continue to rebel, until you come down off that IRONHORSE and talk to me like a man.

I dont' boast a high intellect. So your searching the wrong area. You can desperately try to find a soft spot all you won't, but you won't.

There is no reason for envy and jealousy in cyberspace. So please get over yourself.
Just stop it, HeruStar--you lost the argument, man--you simply lost the argument. Get over it and try wrapping your mind around another subject.

I have an even better idea--why don't you try posting a discussion on your perspective on dating? Why don't you post a discussion on how you think a man should prepare himself to interact in the dating scene? *Setting my stopwatch*
He does need reassurance, and affirmation doesn't he?

Sense there was no response to my inquiry about HeruStar creating his own discussion on his perspective on dating and hygene I'll just end this childish argument right here. HeruStar, you're welcome to make any kind of snide, last word comments because this issue has been beaten to death--regardless of who tries to take whom's side, I know when I'm right and I know when I'm wrong--arguing about it doesn't prove anything. This topic is dead.

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