Are you disturbed by Something New?

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Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with being a landscaper. I cannot see myself dating a landscaper ...

You've expressed my problem with the movie - A fine Black professional woman wouldn't even look at a Black landscaper, but will hook up with a white landscaper.

I really don't have a problem with inter-racial relationships, they're not for me, but hey, your relationship is not about what's for me. But I say, if there is something that you wouldn't accept in your own, why accept it, along with the other baggage, in another racial group?

quote:

Originally posted by Nikcara:

So here is my issue, if a sister's going to date a a white boy for this movie, why can't he be a Doctor, Lawyer, Accountant, Architect, Engineer, etc.

I don't know. When I first met my wife, I was working at a local sandpaper factory, rewinding rolls of sandpaper discs and pulling glue out of big boxes (or more accurately, pulling and prying the sides of the boxes off of the glue) for $8.00 an hour, with time and a half for overtime.

I'm not sure where that ranks relative to landscapers, but would you feel better if the guy were rewinding sandpaper and pulling glue instead?

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Originally posted by Kweli4Real:

But I say, if there is something that you wouldn't accept in your own, why accept it, along with the other baggage, in another racial group?

I'm at a bit of a disadvantage here, not having seen the movie, but is there anything in the movie that suggests that the woman would not have considered dating a Black landscaper? If so, then I'll agree that it is a bit strange, but if not, then I don't really see the issue.

by Ricardomath

quote:

quote:
Originally posted by Kweli4Real:

But I say, if there is something that you wouldn't accept in your own, why accept it, along with the other baggage, in another racial group?


I'm at a bit of a disadvantage here, not having seen the movie, but is there anything in the movie that suggests that the woman would not have considered dating a Black landscaper? If so, then I'll agree that it is a bit strange, but if not, then I don't really see the issue.

Here's the issue, you always see Black men who are doctors, lawyers, architects, engineers, and oh yes...professional athletes with white women. Yet, it is the rare white man who is with a Black woman, let alone married to one. You and your wife are the exception and not the rule, we can atleast agree on that. The problem is that white men who are doctors, lawyers, architects, engineers and professional athletes are never seen married to Black women. There is no balance thus the reason that Something New is disturbing.

I guess to me it is about being equally yoked, if you and your wife met a work and you were both pulling glue or rewinding sandpaper, that is one thing, if she is an engineer then the same issue applies. But I would feel the same even if she was white.

quote:

Originally posted by Nikcara:
So here is my issue, if a sister's going to date a a white boy for this movie, why can't he be a Doctor, Lawyer, Accountant, Architect, Engineer, etc. .......So what do you think, is the movie Something New disturbing for our culture and our future?

Nikcara,
I am not surprized about the theme of the movie. Being a resident physician myself, the topic/issue of white male doctors (or other professionals for that matter) marry a fellow black female doctor is such that it is one option that is really frowned on or avoided. It does happen but it is one of the rarest things in medical school or at least at Robert Wood Johnson when I was there. Most of the white professional guys have a tendency to see black professional sistas as bossy, overbearing etc, they also express concern about the approval or the lack thereof by their often high place families and the concern of having mixed babies.
So it seems that the same patterns that occurs with many professional black guys ie dating or marrying non-black females with lower education also occurs in equally black professional females to some degree. I could be wrong but it does seem to be a pattern.

quote:

Originally posted by Nikcara:


Here's the issue, you always see Black men who are doctors, lawyers, architects, engineers, and oh yes...professional athletes with white women.

The problem is that white men who are doctors, lawyers, architects, engineers and professional athletes are never seen married to Black women. There is no balance thus the reason that Something New is disturbing.

I didnt see the movie.....but i will tomorrow.

Your statements above caused me to think............

Are we being encouraged/trained to think, its ok to date/marry another race, and expect 'less than'.

Again, i will see the movie tomorrow.....but i would be surprised/annoyed if this was the case.

I just watched this past afternoon. It wasn't bad. It wasn't so in-your-face, ghetto-fabulous like "The Brothers" and don't get me started on that tripe of a movie.

Only thing I can say that it is somewhat original, and it is "new." At least the black male characters didn't act all jaded and saying "why the sista dating the white boy" and then turn around and they're slobbering over a blonde bimbo.

Whoa....


Hmmm.... I do understand the concept you're putting forward, but the following is an oxymoron....

quote:

Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with being a landscaper. I cannot see myself dating a landscaper, nor do I see any of my friends dating landscapers either. Birds of a Feather.....

How patronizing!

I need to ask the question PLEASE... what is so darn good about doctors beyond their income level?

Aren't people deluding themselves just a little about the 'worth of doctors as companions'????

SOME of them (black or white) may be intelligent=interesting, but a lot of them are arrogant BORES with nothing interesting to say, drug habits, and tedious linear lives. A lot of these morph from interesting, wild interns into sendentary, unsmiling boring men.

There's a bit of an over-reaction happening here. I'll suggest that some people go into medicine (or law) for the WRONG reasons. Because without a framed authentication on the wall they are nobodies.

If by the end of the film the landscaper (black or white) had become a Hollywood mega-success (supposedly 'justifying' that he was worthy of investing time, effort and love into) would that make you happier?

Landscapers have to have quite a few skills beside weeding the garden. Engineering, technical drawing, 3-dimentional architectural spacial thinking (like an architect). Artistic flair, creativity, a concept of plants and the environment. Able to run their own business, be it a micro business or a consultancy with a network of sub-contractors.

So if he is an architect - THE MOST ARROGANT PEOPLE ON THE PLANET as much as I like them and what they create. Or an engineer he is ok? Ever actually LIVED WITH an engineer?

Geesh.

I'm all for positive aspirational roles for black males, but please, showcase the PERSONAL TRAITS for success. Why is nobody promoting the idea of a black small business man?

To me, that is the ideal black or white male inspirational figure. Someone who has to deal with all facets of human and business behaviour.

THAT MAN IS A SUCCESS and should be applauded.
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I'm debating on going to check it out. I know it won't be on Super Bowl Sunday thats for damn sure.

I do want to see it, just so I can review the social content of the message.

Nikara, after my hasty outburst yesterday, I was thinking a bit more about who would make a film with the scenario you suggest?

I doubt this film will open here so my comments are all hypothetical.

From a filmmaking perspective, I am trying to imagine which directors would pair a professional white male and a professional white female. Especially when we all know that Hollywood is so sexist.

Here are the scenarios

Spike Lee made a film about a black male and white female professionals, but as a black male, would be unlikely to make a film about a professional white male and professional black female.

The marketing dept in Hollywood would shake their heads because the majority of romance films are seen by white women who aspire to being Cameron Diaz or Julia Roberts - who earns more than any male lead roles last time I looked.

Hollywood could take a risk and pair the couple and aim the film squarely at white males. If they did this, I dread it would be in their usual mysogynist style.

If a black woman wrote and directed the film, I can imagine she would get a lot of flack from other black women (and men) for 'selling out' and promoting inter-racial relationships.

A black female role would break new ground if she was depicted as of equal intelligence and income, to her partner, and a master of her own destiny, rather than a support-wife role. Usually Hollywood puts feisty intellgient women in cartoon roles like TombRaider or Batman and toting guns - still a male symbol. Sort-of heros but still in what I consider subservient 'super-hero-housewife-roles'. Not quite masters of their own destiny.

The only person I can imagine making the film is someone who already makes films with the equal-male-female role imagery with non-black people. That's rare enough already.
So the only name I can think of right now is maybe George Clooney.
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I had a look at the website and noticed that the white guy is Aussie Simon Baker. People here know him for his role in the TV drama The Gardian. And lot of women here think he's their ideal guy.

I hope the film opens here, coz it WILL be interesting to see the reaction from them to his having an Afr Amer girlfriend. Although Simon is a good actor he isn't my cup of tea. I just don't have a thing for blonde male stars. And I am SO over the blonde look for women. Same old same old.
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No, the Black men complaining are a mess. All this nonsense when Black men dip out more than Black women ever have.

So 'Nikkara', was the handsome, blonde, WHITE guy, an up n' coming small business owner,or 'just'....a gardner? Possible 'spoiler in your title, if you do'nt mind giving me the answer.

WHY SANAA! WWWHHHYYY!!!
Everytime a black actress achieves a certain level of success she has to be the love interest of some white guy. This is obviously done to satisfy white mens fantasy of being with a black woman. I suspect if she refuses such roles her career will take a nose dive..For this reason alone this type of movie should not be supported....but then again she has to work

I wonder if Angelina Jolie would've got an Oscar if she was telling Danny Glover to "make me feel gooood!!"

quote:

Originally posted by guru_9ether:
WHY SANAA! WWWHHHYYY!!!
Everytime a black actress achieves a certain level of success she has to be the love interest of some white guy. This is obviously done to satisfy white mens fantasy of being with a black woman. I suspect if she refuses such roles her career will take a nose dive..For this reason alone this type of movie should not be supported....but then again she has to work

I wonder if Angelina Jolie would've got an Oscar if she was telling Danny Glover to "make me feel gooood!!"

DO NOT GO THERE! Halle won! Let it go! It's been four years ago. Halle was not a whore, Nicole Kidman's character was a whore in "Moulin Rouge." Acting like nobody ever gotten pissy drunk and had hot sweaty sex before.

Damn! If you lost your spouse (who was on death row, and didn't get conjugal visits) and your son in the same week, and you were lonely and drunk, you would want somebody to make you feel good too!

Halle wasn't the first black woman to have a sex scene with a white guy before. N'Bushe Wright and Thandie Newton had love scenes with white guys. Hell, even Angela Bassett made out with Ralph Fiennes in "Supernova."

Either Halle Berry was going to win Best Actress for "Monster's Ball" or Renee Zellweger for "Bridget Jones' Diary." Hollywood is about sex and glamour, so there's no way in HELL, they were gonna give Renee the Oscar for playing a horny fat chick from England.

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Halle wasn't the first black woman to have a sex scene with a white guy before. N'Bushe Wright and Thandie Newton had love scenes with white guys. Hell, even Angela Bassett made out with Ralph Fiennes in "Supernova."

This is my point exactly.

BTW I'm not saying halle shouldn't have gotten an Oscar, although I don't think that was her best performance...what I'm saying is that if the tables were turned Angelina Jolie would have had a flop on her hands and controversy out the azz...

...And I never said Haley was a whore...maybe a little unstable, but not a whore.

I liked the movie. Good acting, good storyline. Nice date movie.

I am disturbed by this thread. Love is more important that money.

quote:

Originally posted by art_gurl:
Whoa....


Hmmm.... I do understand the concept you're putting forward, but the following is an oxymoron....

quote:

Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with being a landscaper. I cannot see myself dating a landscaper, nor do I see any of my friends dating landscapers either. Birds of a Feather.....

How patronizing!

I need to ask the question PLEASE... what is so darn good about doctors beyond their income level?

Aren't people deluding themselves just a little about the 'worth of doctors as companions'????

SOME of them (black or white) may be intelligent=interesting, but a lot of them are arrogant BORES with nothing interesting to say, drug habits, and tedious linear lives. A lot of these morph from interesting, wild interns into sendentary, unsmiling boring men.

There's a bit of an over-reaction happening here. I'll suggest that some people go into medicine (or law) for the WRONG reasons. Because without a framed authentication on the wall they are nobodies.

If by the end of the film the landscaper (black or white) had become a Hollywood mega-success (supposedly 'justifying' that he was worthy of investing time, effort and love into) would that make you happier?

Landscapers have to have quite a few skills beside weeding the garden. Engineering, technical drawing, 3-dimentional architectural spacial thinking (like an architect). Artistic flair, creativity, a concept of plants and the environment. Able to run their own business, be it a micro business or a consultancy with a network of sub-contractors.

So if he is an architect - THE MOST ARROGANT PEOPLE ON THE PLANET as much as I like them and what they create. Or an engineer he is ok? Ever actually LIVED WITH an engineer?

Geesh.

great points.

Its sad, to see how materialistic and classist black people have become. A few black people make it into the middle class get a professional job and now all of a sudden the blue collar black people are not good enough. There were a time when the professional black people married and lived along side the working class blacks.Now with the rise of womens rights and and ability to obtain high paying jobs, sistas cant find a decent black man. I read one sista saying I couldnt see myself dating a landscaper or any of her friends either.what does that say about you as a human being? as a person. IS this the message you want to pass to young black girls. If the brother doesnt make a lot of money or have a high paying job he isnt good enough for you. you know the situation of black men in this society and to pile on your men like that is only gonna make live more misserable for you. As for the white guy, its the same as the white woman, as long as they white its cool.Remember guess who's coming to dinner, Sidney was a doctor, and the white woman was a secretary, so its the same senario, a poor white is just as valuable as a rich black.But since we put monetary value on a relationship, who are we to complain , we make the bed we have to ly in it

Ahh, this movie basically bombed at the box office but that was expected, the gay cowboy movie did better and it has been in the theaters for weeks. I guess the miscegenation crowd did not come out in high numbers.

1. "When a Stranger Calls," $22 million.

2. "Big Momma's House 2," $13.35 million.

3. "Nanny McPhee," $9.9 million.

4. "Brokeback Mountain," $5.7 million.

5. "Hoodwinked," $5.3 million.

6. "Underworld Evolution," $5.1 million.

7. "Something New," $5 million.

8. "Annapolis," $3.5 million.

9. "Walk the Line," $3.4 million.

10. "Glory Road," $3 million.

quote:

Originally posted by Nikcara:

Would I date Good Will Hunting, absolutely, but then again he was not realy a janitor now was he.

No, he's an actor. But then again, whoever it was who is playing the landscaper is not really a landscaper, either.

quote:

Originally posted by Nikcara:
by Ricardomath

quote:

quote:
Originally posted by Kweli4Real:

But I say, if there is something that you wouldn't accept in your own, why accept it, along with the other baggage, in another racial group?


I'm at a bit of a disadvantage here, not having seen the movie, but is there anything in the movie that suggests that the woman would not have considered dating a Black landscaper? If so, then I'll agree that it is a bit strange, but if not, then I don't really see the issue.

Here's the issue, you always see Black men who are doctors, lawyers, architects, engineers, and oh yes...professional athletes with white women. Yet, it is the rare white man who is with a Black woman, let alone married to one. You and your wife are the exception and not the rule, we can atleast agree on that.

If we are the exception, it is because we are a BW/WM couple, not because of our professions at the time that we met.

quote:

The problem is that white men who are doctors, lawyers, architects, engineers and professional athletes are never seen married to Black women. There is no balance thus the reason that Something New is disturbing.

I can't speak for them. As for balance, it seems to me that the question of balance involves the question of why there are not more movies with storylines involving positive depictions of Black marrieges and families, as opposed to this individual movie.

But I really don't see the economic point. I know plenty of married couples where one spouse makes significantly money more than the other. I don't make anywhere near what people in the professions that you mention make, but in my current faculty position, I now make nearly twice what my wife makes if I teach during the summer, and she works two jobs, a full time and a part time job. Perhaps I should be considering a divorce?

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I guess to me it is about being equally yoked, if you and your wife met a work and you were both pulling glue or rewinding sandpaper, that is one thing, if she is an engineer then the same issue applies. But I would feel the same even if she was white.

Actually, I met her at a local bar, that has had Latin Dance Parties every Friday and Saturday night for the past 25 years. She was checking ID's and taking cover charges for the parties, and taught me how to dance salsa.

She was working as a cook and dishwasher in a couple of resturaunts at the time.

quote:

Originally posted by RadioRaheem:
I am disturbed by this thread. Love is more important that money.

I was thinking the same thing, but we've beat this horse to death in other threads. Apparently, money is more important than love and race is more important than love. And if we as a people can just get the race problem and the money problem solved then all will be good and right and world peace will ensue...

Apparently love is overrated and has little or no social or economic value. So who needs it?

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If we are the exception, it is because we are a BW/WM couple, not because of our professions at the time that we met.

That's interesting Ricardo ...

In referring to yourself does the WM stand for White Male or White Man?

I noticed that you refer to your wife as a BW, Black Woman, as opposed to the common reference, Black Female.

I find that interesting.

What is LOVE? How does it manifest itself.We live in a Capitalist system,CASH rules everything around me< So why does love matter? Does living in a system based on Capital make love different? How is the family love in relation to this system. If a system is designed to focus on the desires and wishes of the individual does it leave room for love? Or is love this overwhelming force that overcomes all problems? Or does love mean how the individual feels about a particualar person or situation. Is there such thing as group love? Someone please explain this to me> How does God or religion play into this thing called LOVE?

quote:

Originally posted by Faheem:
Ahh, this movie basically bombed at the box office but that was expected, the gay cowboy movie did better and it has been in the theaters for weeks. I guess the miscegenation crowd did not come out in high numbers.

1. "When a Stranger Calls," $22 million.

2. "Big Momma's House 2," $13.35 million.

3. "Nanny McPhee," $9.9 million.

4. "Brokeback Mountain," $5.7 million.

5. "Hoodwinked," $5.3 million.

6. "Underworld Evolution," $5.1 million.

7. "Something New," $5 million.

8. "Annapolis," $3.5 million.

9. "Walk the Line," $3.4 million.

10. "Glory Road," $3 million.

I know I may be , but I think the fact that we live in a society where "Big Momma's House 2" was the #2 movie in the country is more of a threat to the African American community than interacial dating.

quote:

Originally posted by Kweli4Real:

quote:

If we are the exception, it is because we are a BW/WM couple, not because of our professions at the time that we met.

That's interesting Ricardo ...

In referring to yourself does the WM stand for White Male or White Man?

I noticed that you refer to your wife as a BW, Black Woman, as opposed to the common reference, Black Female.

I find that interesting.

Haven't given the abreviations much thought. Right off hand, I'm not sure which is most common.

The rather common abbreviation BBW (for "big beautiful woman") comes to mind. Not sure that I've ever seen BBF.

quote:

Originally posted by guru_9ether:
...And I never said Haley was a whore...maybe a little unstable, but not a whore.

I apologize for that. I'm just tired of defending Halle's win, for those who are just hating b/c they can't get through the day without hating something.

Most of the folks that I know of who "didn't" like what Halle did to win, would've MORE pissed off had she lost. Plus, it's kind of hypocritical for folks getting mad at Halle for the sex scene and we have BET Uncut on the air at 3a.m. And it's more hypocritical for other black actresses (that I've mentioned earlier) to criticize Halle when they too have done interracial love scenes, but I digress.

Come on Huey, you cannot possibly say Mosters Ball is like anything we see on Tv. ALL this movie was about was the typical tragic mullatoo. How can anyone with any black pride appreciate a movie like that .It made me sick to see her reaction at the Oscars, she had the look like "white people love me now" im excepted" it was truely discusting. Who gives a dam about an Oscar anyway, its not created by or for black people

BTW, I just did a couple of quick searches on this board out of curiousity.

"BW" got 57 hits.

"BF" got 18 hits, almost all of which seemed to be using it as an abbreviation for "boyfriend".

quote:

Actually, I met her at a local bar, that has had Latin Dance Parties every Friday and Saturday night for the past 25 years. She was checking ID's and taking cover charges for the parties, and taught me how to dance salsa.

what a romantic way to meet!

speaking for myself, who cares if a man has a degree... as long as he can dance!!! If he has both jackpot!
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quote:

Originally posted by kresge:

quote:

Originally posted by Faheem:
Ahh, this movie basically bombed at the box office but that was expected, the gay cowboy movie did better and it has been in the theaters for weeks. I guess the miscegenation crowd did not come out in high numbers.

I know I may be , but I think the fact that we live in a society where "Big Momma's House 2" was the #2 movie in the country is more of a threat to the African American community than interacial dating.

exactly!
writer + producer + filmmaker + actors + audience = succe$$ful film

quote:

Originally posted by ZAKAR:
Come on Huey, you cannot possibly say Mosters Ball is like anything we see on Tv. ALL this movie was about was the typical tragic mullatoo. How can anyone with any black pride appreciate a movie like that .It made me sick to see her reaction at the Oscars, she had the look like "white people love me now" im excepted" it was truely discusting. Who gives a dam about an Oscar anyway, its not created by or for black people

And that should be a reason not to strive for it? MB isn't as bad as what we see on tv? Have you heard of BET UNCUT? She was the FIRST BLACK WOMAN EVER TO WIN BEST ACTRESS! How was she supposed to act? "Aw, shit! I won! I'd be damned!"

I'm sick and tired of us not even TRYING to make decent films and tv shows, because it's not "created by and for black people." Do the damn thing, but do it right. It's a sad thing that "Big Momma's House 2" is the #1 comedy in America, and it made more money faster than Glory Road.

It's about winning, not about accepting. Chow Yun Fat was in Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. You know why it won 10 nominations & 4 Oscars? Because Hollywood aren't going to have another Color Purple flashback. They already pissed off black folks, do you think they'll piss off Asians too? Soon after Crouching won, you know somebody said "black actors better win next year!" A year later, Denzel and Halle won.

Fat went back to Hong Kong because H'wood wouldn't let him do anything besides be another Jet Li or Jackie Chan. Couldn't have a leading lady. He can kick ass, but can't get any ass.

And speaking of black pride, how in the hell the NAACP give an Image Award to "The Parkers" for three years in a row for Best Comedy Series?

Whaz Up Peeps. I am on luch before trial, was away on vacation for a week. Canadaian Skiing is fun. I will try to respond to this by the end of the week depending on how work and my body feels. Caught the flu in Canada, it is killiing me.

quote:

Originally posted by Faheem:
Ahh, this movie basically bombed at the box office but that was expected, the gay cowboy movie did better and it has been in the theaters for weeks. I guess the miscegenation crowd did not come out in high numbers.

1. "When a Stranger Calls," $22 million.

2. "Big Momma's House 2," $13.35 million.

3. "Nanny McPhee," $9.9 million.

4. "Brokeback Mountain," $5.7 million.

5. "Hoodwinked," $5.3 million.

6. "Underworld Evolution," $5.1 million.

7. "Something New," $5 million.

8. "Annapolis," $3.5 million.

9. "Walk the Line," $3.4 million.

10. "Glory Road," $3 million.

10.4 million as of 2/21/2006