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quote:
Originally posted by Oshun Auset:
I think because you are closer to what is considered the beauty standard(or at least attempting to make yourself appear as such), you aren't comfortable with Black/African beauty being praised. Get over yourself.


I wanted to avoid discussing this topic further with Sister Daniella because I realize that for many biracial African-Americans, conceptions of beauty is a sensitive issue. Shortly after my last response to her, someone informed me about Daniella's biracial background, and then it became clear to me as to why this topic made her uncomfortable. We know that biracial children grow up being both praised and hated by both Blacks and Whites, specifically, for their skin complexion and hair texture, two characteristics over which they have no control. And as a biracial woman, to read someone praising the "Black side" of her racial makeup exclusively, may have been offensive. However, my purpose for starting this thread, and similar threads praising the beauty and accomplishments of Black women, is done only to shine a light on a segment of America's population that unfortunately gets very little, if any, positive attention and affirmation. For this reason, I will continue to start threads like these. However, I want to stress that these threads are not to mistaken as an attempt to dismiss the beauty and accomplishments of other women, but to show appreciation for the cultural/racial group to which I belong.
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quote:
Originally posted by Oshun Auset:

BTW, since everyone is so equally beautiful and every race's features are equally appreciated, why do you have a straight weave? I saw you avatar/photo...why are you trying to remove some of your 'Africaness' since we are all so lovely and the media doesn't effect our personal preferences? Why isn't your naturally nappy hair 'good enough' to wear? and don't give me that crap that it is just a 'style'.


Interesting question.
quote:
Originally posted by Rowe:
quote:
Originally posted by Oshun Auset:

BTW, since everyone is so equally beautiful and every race's features are equally appreciated, why do you have a straight weave? I saw you avatar/photo...why are you trying to remove some of your 'Africaness' since we are all so lovely and the media doesn't effect our personal preferences? Why isn't your naturally nappy hair 'good enough' to wear? and don't give me that crap that it is just a 'style'.


Interesting question.


that's like the same question i asked her... how come african beauty is never appreciated in the mainstream media but we're supposed to believe that we're all equally beautiful.
quote:
Originally posted by caribbeanflavored:
how come african beauty is never appreciated in the mainstream media but we're supposed to believe that we're all equally beautiful.

Okay ladies, I have a question about this. I understand that mainstream media is powerful, but I've never felt that it controlled what I considered to be beautiful, or what I was attracted to. The media tells me that ultra-thin women are beautiful, but I find them sickly. Physically, I'm attracted to healthy women. Too fat, or too thin, or too anything for that matter, is a turn off for me. I've been that way my whole life, regardless of what the media tells me every day. I know what beauty is without the media having to tell me. Why isn't it the same for you women?

The other thing about the media, is that they are catering to the masses... and that ain't us! We're only 13% of the population. Even though there is beauty in all races, why should the media care about that? Even Black sitcoms didn't get real air time until white people started watching them (Cosby). Hip hop didn't become a billion dollar industry until White people started buying it. Now, I know I'm preaching to the choir here. But, knowing what you know about the media, why is it so hard for you to ignore?
quote:
Originally posted by Black Viking:
Okay ladies, I have a question about this. I understand that mainstream media is powerful, but I've never felt that it controlled what I considered to be beautiful, or what I was attracted to.


I think if we really thought about it, we might be surprised at how much our perceptions are media influenced.

quote:

The media tells me that ultra-thin women are beautiful, but I find them sickly. Physically, I'm attracted to healthy women. Too fat, or too thin, or too anything for that matter, is a turn off for me.


I'm the same way... I can't think of a single "supermodel" that I ever found very attractive - OK maybe Tyra Big Grin. The super skinny types have never done it for me.

quote:

The other thing about the media, is that they are catering to the masses... and that ain't us! We're only 13% of the population.


We may not be the majority... but... we are the ones who really need to work on loving ourselves... and we are too hooked into the media.... white folk might have made hip hop a billion dollar industry .. but we're the ones who are hurt by placing too much coin in the world of pimps, bitches, and hos.... see xxGambitxx's new thread .

quote:

Now, I know I'm preaching to the choir here. But, knowing what you know about the media, why is it so hard for you to ignore?


This is a question I ask myself all the time... But I'm someone who doesn't watch TV (at all). I got rid of my cable 6 years ago and haven't looked back. I also very rarely listen to radio. My info comes from books, word of mouth, and my favorite internet venues. I only listen to music that I like... and can completely tune out the world if I choose to.

So I'm perpetually amazed at people who complain about TV, or the movies, or music, etc.

PS: Though I've never been a fan of supermodels, interestingly enough, since I unhooked myself from the Matrix, I've found that my concepts of beauty have become that much more flexible.
quote:
Originally posted by Black Viking:
The media tells me that ultra-thin women are beautiful, but I find them sickly. Physically, I'm attracted to healthy women. Too fat, or too thin, or too anything for that matter, is a turn off for me. I've been that way my whole life, regardless of what the media tells me every day. I know what beauty is without the media having to tell me. Why isn't it the same for you women? Why is it so hard for you to ignore?


African-American men, like most men who are under the influence of Western culture, have been more affected by Western standards of beauty than they are willing to acknowledge and admit. Despite Black men's sustaining interest in full-figured women, even today, Black men will find themselves attracted to Black women whose appearance is closer to Western ideals of beauty (e.g., chemically-processed straightened hair, very light, tan, or brown skin, biracial features, etc.) Typically, these are women that Black men, right along with White men, will find attractive versus the Black woman whose hair is tightly-curled and/or course and very dark-skinned. I remember when Sister Daniella first posted an image of herself on the forum. As expected, she began to receive a slew of messages from men, even men who rarely post at all, suddenly came out of nowhere just to pay her a compliment on how "fine" she was (which is ok), but don't tell me about how "unaffected" Black men are by the media. Please. You all, just like the rest of us, are BRAINWASHED into accepting and believing that these kinds of images are what is attractive. Here is an example of an image that is most favored by Black men:

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The first image is an example of the type of woman that Black men seek to marry. The second image is example of the type of woman that Black men avoid. Someone made the argument that because Black people are not the majority in America that we should expect to see overwhelming images of White beauty. But what accounts for the negative images of Black women? What accounts for the negative images of Black men? And just to show you how bad the situation is. An African-American woman who is a member of an African-American forum acknowleges the beauty found in her own race and that made some people uncomfortable! So this is a very serious problem. We cannot afford to dismiss this problem as something that we simply have to "shut out and get over." Images are very powerful. They always have been and they always will be.

Our children are influenced by the media also, and not just in the area of beauty and appearance. Media also influences what children (and adults) consider to be "good food." A lot of what the media passes off as "food" is really not. Americans are literally eating toxic waste each day because powerful images in the form of commercials and advertisments imbibe into their minds that such foods are acceptable to eat.
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quote:
Originally posted by Rowe:
Please. You all, just like the rest of us, are BRAINWASHED into accepting and believing that these kinds of images are what is attractive. Here is an example of an image that is most favored by Black men:


Rowe, please... we got male bonding going on over in The Den...

And these images ARE attractive... That doesn't mean that other women aren't attractive...

Yes, we think Daniella is attractive ... but we also think qty226 is attractive ...

Not that many women here post their pics in their avatars...
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Originally posted by HonestBrother:
I think if we really thought about it, we might be surprised at how much our perceptions are media influenced.

You may be right about that. But, like you, there's a reason I don't watch tv.

quote:
I'm the same way... I can't think of a single "supermodel" that I ever found very attractive - OK maybe Tyra Big Grin. The super skinny types have never done it for me.

The only supermodel that I recall really liking was Naomi Campbell. Even she was a little on the skinny side for me. I'm not very judgemental about it though. I figure, so long as I can't see her bones sticking out, it's cool.

quote:
We may not be the majority... but... we are the ones who really need to work on loving ourselves... and we are too hooked into the media.... white folk might have made hip hop a billion dollar industry .. but we're the ones who are hurt by placing too much coin in the world of pimps, bitches, and hos....

I agree. But, this is all the more reason why we should pay less attention to mainstream media sources. They're not really talking to us anyway, and most of what they say about us is at best dehumanizing and at worst demonizing. It's not fit for rational consumption.
quote:
Originally posted by Rowe:
quote:
Originally posted by Black Viking:
The media tells me that ultra-thin women are beautiful, but I find them sickly. Physically, I'm attracted to healthy women. Too fat, or too thin, or too anything for that matter, is a turn off for me. I've been that way my whole life, regardless of what the media tells me every day. I know what beauty is without the media having to tell me. Why isn't it the same for you women? Why is it so hard for you to ignore?


African-American men, like most men who are under the influence of Western culture, have been more affected by Western standards of beauty than they are willing to acknowledge and admit. Despite Black men's sustaining interest in full-figured women, even today, Black men will find themselves attracted to Black women whose appearance is closer to Western ideals of beauty (e.g., chemically-processed straightened hair, very light, tan, or brown skin, biracial features, etc.) Typically, these are women that Black men, right along with White men, will find attractive versus the Black woman whose hair is tightly-curled and/or course and very dark-skinned. I remember when Sister Daniella first posted an image of herself on the forum. And as I expected, she began to receive a slew of messages from men, even men who rarely post at all, suddenly came out of nowhere just to pay her compliment on how "beautiful" she was. So don't tell me about how "unaffected" Black men are by the media. Please. You all, just like the rest of us, are BRAINWASHED into accepting and believing that these kinds of images are what is attractive.

Actually, I was only speaking for and about myself. Then I asked a question in regards to carribeanflavored's comment about mainsteam media and why aren't there more Black women in it if everyone's equally beautiful. I wan't trying to tell you anything about Black men. It's a good thing too, since you already know all about them. Roll Eyes

quote:
Here is an example of an image that is most favored by Black men:

Well... if you had actually read that thread, you would have noticed that most of us were commenting on her muscular physique, not her light-skin or "good hurr", or whatever else you thought we were talking about.
quote:
Originally posted by Black Viking:
Well... if you had actually read that thread, you would have noticed that most of us were commenting on her muscular physique, not her light-skin or "good hurr", or whatever else you thought we were talking about.


BV has a point. Actually I wasn't sure at first that she was black... but after I looked at some of the pictures on the link that xxGambitxx posted I saw her biracial features more clearly. It wasn't her face I found particularly attractive.
quote:
Originally posted by Black Viking:
quote:
Originally posted by Rowe:
An African-American woman who is a member of an African-American forum acknowleges the beauty found in her own race and that made some people uncomfortable!

Stop all this projecting... Dizzy is the only one who became uncomfortable.

Whatever... I knew I should have just stayed out of this one. Roll Eyes


When will you learn? nono The only right answers are the ones provided by sister Rowe - the sooner you accept that, the less painful these threads become! lol
quote:
Originally posted by Rowe:
quote:
Originally posted by Black Viking:
The media tells me that ultra-thin women are beautiful, but I find them sickly. Physically, I'm attracted to healthy women. Too fat, or too thin, or too anything for that matter, is a turn off for me. I've been that way my whole life, regardless of what the media tells me every day. I know what beauty is without the media having to tell me. Why isn't it the same for you women? Why is it so hard for you to ignore?


African-American men, like most men who are under the influence of Western culture, have been more affected by Western standards of beauty than they are willing to acknowledge and admit. Despite Black men's sustaining interest in full-figured women, even today, Black men will find themselves attracted to Black women whose appearance is closer to Western ideals of beauty (e.g., chemically-processed straightened hair, very light, tan, or brown skin, biracial features, etc.) Typically, these are women that Black men, right along with White men, will find attractive versus the Black woman whose hair is tightly-curled and/or course and very dark-skinned. I remember when Sister Daniella first posted an image of herself on the forum. And as I expected, she began to receive a slew of messages from men, even men who rarely post at all, suddenly came out of nowhere just to pay her compliment on how "beautiful" she was. So don't tell me about how "unaffected" Black men are by the media. Please. You all, just like the rest of us, are BRAINWASHED into accepting and believing that these kinds of images are what is attractive. Here is an example of an image that is most favored by Black men:


Slow your row on the generatizations, sista Rowe.

Some AA men love their sistas non-european looking!
quote:
Originally posted by HonestBrother:
BV has a point. Actually I wasn't sure at first that she was black... but after I looked at some of the pictures on the link that xxGambitxx posted I saw her biracial features more clearly. It wasn't her face I found particularly attractive.


I had no idea either. After my last response to Daniella, someone sent me a private message telling me that she was biracial, and so I decided to just leave the topic alone because I thought that maybe this was a sensitive issue for her.
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quote:
Originally posted by Black Viking:
Well... if you had actually read that thread, you would have noticed that most of us were commenting on her muscular physique.


Sure. You know it's not a huge deal to me what you guys find attractive. But you asked the sisters a question and I answered as best I could.
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