quote:Originally posted by The one and only ME:quote:Originally posted by ZAKAR:
No that doesnt mean you are living in a fantacy world? but what love is really unconditional?
Im sure if you ask brothers on this board if they have been dissapointed by women many will say yes, including myself
How is asking a woman what she considers a good man confusing to me. Actually that would give me insight into the type of person she is. Of course people have different ideas of a good man, but if you have no idea what you think a good man is , how could you ever find one, thats my point.At least be able to articulate what you feel a good man is , thats my poi
My simple answer to that is: Loving someone not BECAUSE of who they are but IN SPITE OF who they are.... There's more but thats just kinda "it" in a nutshell.
Ok, I got your point. We are on the same page, here.
No fantasy seeker here, but several of my black female aquaintances decided to accept the person they 'fell in love with', because they wanted to accept the person, regardless of their shortcomings. My girlfriend from Jr. High, met this guy several years ago, he had some issues, as do we all, but she said she would 'work with them', because love is about unconditional acceptance. After he became abusive, she attemtpted to move on, he said he was sorry; she took him back; to, to many times. The last time she allowed him to re-enter her life, was last year, Christmas, 2004, he stabbed her to death, placed her under the Xmas tree, and then went to her family's house and claimed he did'nt know where she was. We buried her on New Year's day, 2005. Now she was like many black women, before she met him, she was turning down guys, because they did'nt fit 'her criteria', but someone, said, stop fantasizing, and choose someone because he has prospects, he has potential, etc. Yeah, right.
I do'nt believe that black women, the one's I associate with, are seeking the 'white knight', because that has never, ever been an option; I think what we're seeking, is emotional compatibility, with 'some semblance of security'...and strong communication, friendship, good/sexual compatibility. If that is fantasy, than I need to check with the brothers' 'Grimm's. or maybe, grim is the reality.