quote:Originally posted by thayfen:
WOW. I've been gone for a while...and you guys still haven't figured this out. I'll give you a clue:
Years ago, when I was single in Detroit; whenever a Sista' I was interested in wanted to put me down nicely. (And, they ALL put me down. Many, not so nicely.) There was one sentence they used. It was this:
"You'd make a great husband and father, but NOT a good boyfriend. I don't want that now, but later I will."
When you fully comprehend what the sentence means and implies, then you may understand the true nature of the conflict within modern-day male/female relations.
The levels of fear displayed by todays so called thug is is overwhelming and somewhat painful to watch. You don't have to be exceedingly bright to see whats going on here. These men are hidden behind dark clothing and baggy garments that illustrate the darkness they live in and the insecurities that torments them. They won't comb thier hair, put appliances in thier mouth that only make them less attractive, refuse to wear clothe that fit,don't have the respect of society as a whole and often not even thier families.
I see grown men unable to make the transition from being little boys into responsible adults. Still walking around with their hats on backwards. These are men that can't fight, (can't deal with confrontation so they shoot to kill) I mean just a regular boxing match to settle difference. Unable to communicate intellegently, so violence , grunts and groans and the nodding of the head are used as intimidation , only to throw those unaware of the truth off track. All this smoke and no fire. To scared to address a women intelligently and because of his own insecurity and fear of rejection, he chooses to put her down first, to reject her first, call her inappropriate names and try on every level to degrade her. All because of his fear of rejection. So he hides , and she is drawn in trying to fiquire out what she can do to help this poor soul. The best think she can do is raise the bar so high, till he get the message. The message is it won't work. Women who have bought into this,have also bought into being called bitches and every other foul degrading thing that a man can say concerning the female gender. Unfortunately women have bought into this foolishness so much till men think that it is what women want. I quess women have forgotten that the hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.
Women have they ability to turn thing around if they would only raise the bar. Take a stand, and lets face it, stop sleeping around. They say they want a man to truly love and respect them, but can't stop sleeping around. Now women do think that having the liberty to have as many sexual partners as they want is their perogative, but choosing a thugs is too. I think when todays young women decided that she doesn't want to be like men, and that it's OK to be feminine and not a HO,... things might begin to turn around. It's a hard line and not as easy as it use to be. But women can't have it both ways. It's either a man that loves you or the thug life. A thug, someone that cannot deal with life as it really is. Someone paralyzed by fear. Men who do not have enough courage to be yourself. To choose a thug is to choose despair, loneliness, and hopelessness. To be a thug is to live in fear and lack courage to step out of the dark.