quote:Originally posted by qty226:quote:Originally posted by MidLifeMan:
Dr Phil had an issue of race as a topic today. And there was a black mother with her "mixed" daughter who had issues with her daughter "acting white". Her daughter seemed to gravitate towards whites more then blacks
I dont understand how can she stop her child, from 'acting white'........when the childs father is white.
Too bad i missed that show.......
I saw the show. It was very interesting to me because I'm bi-racial. The question that kept comming to me about that mother was, "How do you act white? Is there a specific way that white people act?" The mother also said she thought her daughter wasn't black enough. So, of course, similar questions present themselves,"How black is black enough? How does one portray blackness?"
I think the mother's unaddressed problem is that her daughter is more than half-white. She has very Aryan features and her skin is just dark enough to look like a tan. She could pass for white to any white person. I think black folks would notice (my experience is that we are more observent of these things)that she had some black in her. Her mother, on the other hand, is very light skinned but definately African. She could not ever pass for white. I think the mothers greater fear is that, if she chose, her daughter could just pass for white and totally turn her back on the black side of her family. To her credit, the daughter gave no indication that she would do that. But the fact that she COULD still scares mom.
I personally have never had this problem. Any one who looks at me knows that I'm not white. White people confuse me with all kinds of stuff (Arab, Mexican, Hawaiian, ect.), but black folks always know where I came from.
Inter-racial dating certainly has its complications (certainly I know...no matter who I date it's inter-racial) but, as in all things, my parents are good teachers. I would say the most important skill to cultivate is patience and sensitivity. Both people have to be patient in their communication, as their styles are likely to be drastically different. Both people also have to be sensitive to any subject in which they or the other person has no frame of reference.