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Reply to "Public Speaking"

I'm weird with public speaking.

I rather speak in front of a full concert hall than an office. I rather speak in front of strangers regardless of their demeanor than friendly people I know.

That's frustrating since most speeches that I have given have been in front of smaller groups of mostly familiar peeps.

I never loved public speaking, but I used to be fine with it. In terms of comfort.

Used to really make fun of people who acted all weird.

But it seems that everything has gotten worse for me every year after being taught put your hands this way, move your eyes that way, angle yourself this way.

Gah. Damn folks took away my mojo.

Now I find public speaking to be very nerve-wracking. Even when I ignore that stuff and try to just do what I wanna do. So I'm not all that sure what's up with me.

I've noticed that I do best when I haven't had time to rehearse. So when I know I gotta say something somewhere, if I can avoid it, I usually don't think too deeply about what I have to say until right up to the time I gotta say it.

That does wonders.

With that method, my heart doesn't start pounding until after it's all over with.

Yesterday I had to give a mini prepared speech in front of maybe ten people I semi-know. I was beating up myself for rehearsing, but unlike I usually am, I didn't feel scared at all.

Kinda like speaking in front of a large group of strangers.

I felt cool about it.

But my body didn't seem to get that message.

A few words in, I was already shaking and dizzy.

But I still felt okay. . .until I noticed my leg doing that Jello jiggle thing.

Very peculiar.
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