HER HONEYMOON IS OVER WHEN...
You let one rip in your sleep
and don't care if he hears.
Talking dirty in bed means
shouting obscenities when he
hogs the blanket.
Chivalry's as dead as the
door he lets slam in your face.
PMS lasts all month.
Your jumbo box of absorbent
maxi-pads is on open display.
"Honey, what are you thinking?"
is now, "Are you finished yet?!"
He yawns when you bitch about that
guy hitting on you at work.
Those frilly, lacy, tiny panties
have become way too uncomfortable.
Two weeks no orgasm.
Three weeks no orgasm ... and you
still don't miss it.
When he lends you five bucks, he
expects it back.
You'd rather spend quality time
with your vibrator.