quote:Originally posted by Rowe:
Again, the problem with the masses of today's Black women not being able to find quality men has less to do with what Black women are doing (or not doing) and MORE to do with the lack of availability of men who are of equal status.
The unfortunate truth is that only a small minority of todays black women hold these levels of standards and prerequisites for men. If most black women held moderate to high standards for black men to meet, black men will conform out of paternal instinct like they did in times past. From the beginning of time, women of all cultures looked for men who were good providers first before bearing their children. Only in the last 40-30 years has black women allowed black men to continue his seed without marrying them first. This is the same time that government assistance seemed to substitute the lost income of the husband (Welfare, Section 8, Friend of the Court, food stamps, etc.)
Majority of black women today do not require a man to marry them, be in a position of a good provider or display characteristics of stability. The black woman has allowed the black man to spread his seed without getting married first, keeping a decent job or abstaining from criminal activity.
The complaints by many black women do not carry any weight because black women still allow and deal with the same issues that they continue to grip about. Many black men do not take the complaints of many black women seriously because they put up with it time after time. Many brothas will stop cheating when sistas leave the relationship instead of sticking around. Many brothas will become good providers when sistas require it before a relationship and children. Many brothas will stay out of the penial system when sistas stigmatize men involved in criminal activity.
Bad values, ethics and the lack of personal responsibility has made many self defeating behaviors and decisions seem O.K. for both sexes. Black men should not ever expect to be able to spread his seed without first marrying and providing for that black women. Conversely, black women should not allow herself to get pregnant by a man who has not married her and cannot provide for her.