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Reply to "Cognitive dissonance and the black woman"

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Originally posted by Huey:
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Originally posted by HonestBrother:
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little minx: ...the important thing from what i've read here, is that for the most part, everyone is complaining because of a general lack of ability to connect with the opposite gender. at least that's positive. at least we still give a damn about the opposite gender of the same race. that means at least we long to connect with each other, even if we are not always successful. that's a start.



I agree with this. If I didn't care, I wouldn't complain... Smile
yeah


Do we EVER move past complaining? When does caring and sharing turn into positive action. If "we" as a collective people have been having this discussion then at some point on boths sides should come do some consesus, or agree to dissagree.

I think speaking in absolutes on both sides is a big no, no. Even with statistics and research anyone who has taken a reasearch class knows research can be tainted depending how you report it, and test for certain answers. That being said please know that there are ALL KINDS of Black women. If you come across a sista who isn't into you don't despair. Let her make that choice and you just move on.

I had issues like this about black men not being interested in a full figured woman like myself. I did not make the sweeping general statement that this is the "new trend", and ask why Black men are like this. I knew better...there had to be somebody for me.

I am educated, work in a professional setting, and only see one other Black man in my work environment that is on my professional level, and he is married. The other Black men work in maintenance and security. And yes some of them are attracted to me, and I am open to even dating one of them. When I meet a man if he is not intelligent (not meaning college grad) we can not have a realtionship, period. He must be intelligent, I prefer a man who is well rounded, well read, well traveled, strong and secure in himself and his community, one who is stable financially, down to earth and very humble. God-loving, articulate, understanding, a good communicator, and affectionate. Is this unrealistic? NO! I am open to someone working towards acheiving these things for themselves, but am not open to being with someone who does not wish to possess these qualities.

Have I come across this man? Yes... Was he interested in me? No... It wasn't until I moved South that I even started dating again. And my prospects are better, so far I've dated one college graduate, and am getting to know others. So we do exist...but are "we" what YOU are REALLY looking for? 19
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